Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Project X (2012)

Thomas (Thomas Mann) is a shy and quiet teenager, but he’s about to turn seventeen, and his friends, Costa (Oliver Cooper) and J.B. (Johnathan Daniel Brown) are planning a wild birthday party. Thomas’ parents are taking a little vacation for their anniversary, so Thomas will have the house all to himself. Costa tries to bring Thomas out of his shell, and he doesn’t hold back anything, as he prepares for Thomas’ big birthday bash. Drugs, alcohol, women, and inflatable castles. Costa’s madness doesn’t have any boundaries, as he plans Thomas’ party. Costa wants to throw the birthday bash of a lifetime, but Thomas’ wild birthday party quickly spirals out of control.

** Deep Sigh**

For a little while, Chronicle did give me some hope for the found-footage era in Hollywood, but Project X has ruined everything for me. This film has no structure, no plot, and a coherent story is pretty much non-existent in this film. Project X features all of the major problems I have with the “realistic” style of filmmaking, and films like Project X give me a reason to despise the found-footage craze in Hollywood.

Project X wants to be this raunchy and shocking found-footage film, that gives you an inside look at the wild birthday party for a seventeen year old kid. Well, you will see plenty of tits in Project X, and the dialogue does feature a good amount of graphic sexual content. Also, you’ll see lots of drug and alcohol abuse here, as everyone goes crazy during Thomas’ epic birthday party. And it felt like they were going after the world record for a film that most frequently uses the word “pussy.” But I really couldn’t feel the shocking moments in this one. Here’s a list of the jaw-dropping moments in Project X:

A high school girl takes a piss outside on the driveway.

Ummm, yeah. A woman peeing outside on a driveway. That’s shocking. This scene didn’t make me laugh, and it didn’t leave me speechless. It was just there.

Dogs have sex.

Again, nothing shocking about this. This might’ve pulled some laughs out of other people in the audience, but this scene didn’t do anything for me at all.

A dwarf gets thrown in an oven, and a group of bullies/wannabe tough guys lock him inside. When the dwarf escapes, he decides to blow off some steam, as he punches random people (including a woman) in the crotch area.

The dwarf is still pissed off. The random crotch shots weren’t enough, and he wants revenge for being bullied earlier in the night, so he decides to take the Mercedes (this car belongs to Thomas’ dad by the way), and he drives it into the pool.

Yeah, they constantly showed this scene in the trailers, and watching the Mercedes plunge into the pool loses its shock value once you’ve seen it so many times. Of course, you didn’t know who drove the car into the pool, but they constantly showed this scene over and over again in the trailers, and this particular scene just bored me, when I finally saw it in the film.

And for the grand finale, T-Rick(Rick Shapiro) torches Thomas’ house and the entire block with a flamethrower.

T-Rick is a drug dealer, and earlier in the film, Costa bought some pot from him, and at the same time, he stole a lawn gnome. Well, this particular lawn gnome is filled with ecstasy. During the party, the lawn gnome is broken open with a baseball bat, and the kids at the party decide to get high for free, and of course, this doesn’t sit well with T-Rick.

I’ll admit, I did chuckle a few times during this scene. Rick Shapiro really did look like a guy, who completely lost his mind, and T-Rick’s violent rampage was kind of funny, but T-Rick and his flamethrower couldn’t save this film for me.

I also could’ve done without the “boner” scene in the locker room (you’ll know what I’m talking about, if you decide to watch this film).
**End spoilers**

Project X wants you to enjoy the mayhem, but I couldn’t, because the shocking moments in this film were very lame. Also, Project X wants you to lose yourself in a world of wild partying and half naked high school girls, but Project X didn’t give me any kind of adrenaline rush, and the party scenes just started to bore me after a while.

The acting from the majority of the cast was mediocre at best, and Costa has to be one of the most annoying characters I’ve ever seen in any type of film. Costa is one of those delusional losers, who tries way too hard to be cool. Costa was supposed to be the cool and hip livewire in this film, but I just felt like punching this character in the face most of the time. Oliver Cooper didn’t provide any enjoyable comedy. He was VERY annoying, but he couldn’t pull any laughs out of me. I could tolerate the rest of the cast, but Cooper’s obnoxious performance did help drag this rating down to a zero for me.

Project X is utter shit. This film will only appeal to the average horny male teenager, who fantasizes about throwing wild and epic house parties, that are filled with pot, alcohol, other drugs, and orgies with the hot and popular girls, he never had a chance with in the first place.

Also, the thought of seeing a bunch of half naked and attractive young women might lure you to this film. I’m telling you right now, don’t let yourself get suckered into Project X because of this. The constant showcase of “BOOBIES!” really isn’t worth it at all, and you’ll probably find more enjoyment and thrills from internet porn, or a Playboy magazine.

The mean spirited nature (the popular and cool bully flexing his muscles, making fun of and picking on a dwarf, because of his size, fat jokes, referring to the average high school girls as “ugly bitches,” etc.) of Project X didn’t bother me too much, because I’ve seen and heard a lot worse in other films. Still, Project X is a pile of trash. The movie poster for Project X promises to show you “THE PARTY YOU‘VE ONLY DREAMED ABOUT,” but Project X didn’t take me into this exciting and crazy fantasy world, and I didn’t dream about the party of a lifetime after I watched this film.

At first, The Devil Inside was my pick for the worst found-footage film in 2012, but Project X does give this film some strong competition., and Project X also deserves some recognition as one of the worst films in 2012.

Final Rating: 0/10

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