Monday, September 30, 2013

+1(2013)(Minor Spoilers Review)


**This review contains MINOR spoilers, no major plot twists, reveals, or surprises are revealed in this review**

During a local house party hosted by Angad (Rohan Kymal), three friends encounter a series of different problems. David (Rhys Wakefield) is trying to repair a broken relationship with his girlfriend, Jill (Ashley Hinshaw), Allison (Suzanne  Dengel) is struggling to fit in, and David’s best friend, Teddy (Logan Miller) sets his sights on a one night stand with the seemingly unattainable Melanie (Natalie Hall).

David tires to come up with a scheme to get some time alone with Jill, so she can forget about, Steve (Peter Zimmerman), her date for the night. But an unexplainable supernatural phenomenon disrupts everything……

Well, I’ll get this out of the way now. Rohan Kymal’s Angad is the most annoying character in this film. Angad is this pandering loser, who’ll do ANYTHING to build up his reputation as the “big man on campus.” Plus, he has this annoying and persistent habit of trying to fit in with all the cool kids, when it’s clear 95% of the people at the party can stand him.

Hinshaw delivers the best performance, with Rhys Wakefield taking the spot for runner up. I get the point of Wakefield’s David being this lost and clueless dope, who’s trying to figure things out, but the Jill character is more passionate, angry, and vindictive. Bottom line, Jill has a more lively personality, and Hinshaw was far more convincing, especially during the heated arguments with David. Wakefield isn’t awful, but David is such a boring character. Logan Miller is okay at best, and Hall is just eye candy for the most part. Suzanne Dengel? She’s okay. Allison has a one-dimensional personality, as the typical angry high school outcast/loner, who spends most of her time listening to angry rock music, and hating everything. Not a bad performance from Dengel, but nothing too remarkable either.

Plus One feels like two movies in one: first half is a wild and crazy party movie, but the second half is a full blown sci-fi thriller. To use a more recent example, it’s like Project X meets an episode of The Twilight Zone. At first, you’ll hear loud club music, see wild party games, a naked woman, who’s being used as a buffet table with food spread across her body, topless women, and strippers performing some weird glow in the dark routine.

Plus One is loaded with a lot of noticeable problems, but I’d be lying to you if I said I didn’t have a lot of fun with this one. Watching Plus One is like watching a flaming train wreck with a fireworks show in the background, and a bear on a unicycle juggling, it’s almost impossible to look away. The hectic mashup of sci-fi elements, a love story, and a party movie will probably annoy most people. But for me, Plus One is still an ambitious and bold sci-fi thriller, that takes a lot of risky chances with hopes of being something different, and I apprentice the effort.

Rating: 7/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

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+1 (2013)(Spoiler Review)


**This review contains spoilers**


During a surprise visit to his girlfriend Jill’s (Ashley Hinshaw) college, as she prepares to compete in a fencing tournament, David (Rhys Wakefield) accidentally kisses the woman, who defeated Jill after the competition. Heartbroken at the sight of her boyfriend kissing another woman, Jill disappears before David has a chance to explain himself.

After the incident, Jill refuses to speak to or see David, and when David tries to reach out to Jill via social media, Jill blocks him. David, looking for another chance to apologize to Jill, follows his best friend, Teddy (Logan Miller) to a local house party hosted by Angad (Rohan Kymal), who’s desperately seeking acceptance from everyone. At the party, David and Teddy are surprised by Allison (Suzanne Dengel), another friend, who’s a known outcast, and David struggles to get a moment alone with Jill after she shows up to the party with a new guy named Steve (Peter Zimmerman).

But Dave’s mission to recapture Jill’s heart takes a backseat to a bigger problem, when an asteroid crashes into Earth. As the glowing asteroid fuses with the local power lines, the asteroid causes uncontrollable rips in the current timewave, creating a set of clones for each person at the party. The unexplainable phenomenon interrupts Teddy’s one night stand with Melanie (Natalie Hall), and together, David, Allison, and Teddy try to come up with a solution to control the cloning problem.

Well, I’ll get this out of the way now. Rohan Kymal’s Angad is the most annoying character in this film. Angad is this pandering loser, who’ll do ANYTHING to build up his reputation as the “big man on campus.” Plus, he has this annoying and persistent habit of trying to fit in with all the cool kids, when it’s clear 95% of the people at the party can stand him.

Hinshaw delivers the best performance, with Rhys Wakefield taking the spot for runner up. I get the point of Wakefield’s David being this lost and clueless dope, who’s trying to figure things out, but the Jill character is more passionate, angry, and vindictive. Bottom line, Jill has a more lively personality, and Hinshaw was far more convincing, especially during the heated arguments with David. Wakefield isn’t awful, but David is such a boring character. Logan Miller is okay at best, and Hall is just eye candy for the most part. Suzanne Dengel? She’s okay. Allison has a one-dimensional personality, as the typical angry high school outcast/loner, who spends most of her time listening to angry rock music, and hating everything. Not a bad performance from Dengel, but nothing too remarkable either.

Plus One feels like two movies in one: first half is a wild and crazy party movie, but the second half is a full blown sci-fi thriller. To use a more recent example, it’s like Project X meets an episode of The Twilight Zone. At first, you’ll hear loud club music, see wild party games, a naked woman, who’s being used as a buffet table with food spread across her body, topless women, strippers performing some weird glow in the dark routine, and a VERY lengthy sex scene between Miller and Hall, that’s split up into separate parts. Not complaining about seeing Hall naked, but after while, everything feels really excessive, unfunny, and unnecessarily raunchy to the point where I was just waiting for the romp to be over. Anyway, once David, Teddy, and Allison realize the clones and the rips in the timewaves, you’re thrust into a mysterious and thought-provoking sci-fi thriller.

It’s a good and bad thing for a handful of reasons. The bad side? The transition to the supernatural side of the film feels kind of awkward at first, because they’re trying to tell too many stories at once. David is still trying to fix things with Jill, but he pissed off the real Jill, so learning from his mistakes, David tries his luck with the cloned Jill. And David uses a glass to knock out the cloned version of himself, so the clone won’t ruin things with Jill. Teddy is trying to straighten out a mess after the clone versions of himself and Melanie come fact to face with the real Melanie and the real Teddy. After getting revenge on one of the mean girls, who pulled a prank on her at the party, the real Allison is wandering around until she runs into the cloned Allison, and together, both Allisons have a long talk about life, and it ends with both Allisons kissing each other. AND on top of all that, you have Teddy and Angad doing everything they can to try and convince everyone at the party the clones are real, while they devise a plan to survive.

During the calamity, the story becomes one big jumbled mess, that reaches a too frustrating point more than once, and it’s hard to overlook this. Plus, there’s no resolution to the storylines involving Allison and Teddy. Allison kisses herself (literally), and after Teddy asks for another chance with Melanie…..Melanie simply walks away without giving an answer either way? 

The good side? During the “What’s going on!“ dilemma, the twists and turns are genuinely shocking. David murdering the real Jill in favor of the cloned Jill? Yeah, I didn’t see that coming. David was SO desperate to fix things with Jill, he murdered the real Jill, because he knew the relationship was damaged beyond repair, and he didn’t want to take the chance of the cloned Jill running into the real Jill. What’s going to happen, when the clones come face to face with the real versions of themselves? The clones obviously have no idea what’s going on, but they want life, the real partygoers realize this, and during each time jump, the clones take one step closer to catching up to the current timeline.

So for the grand finale, the real partygoers, barricaded in a pool house, come face to face with the time jumping clones, and out of fear, the real partygoers do everything they can to fight, and kill the clones. It’s a chaotic and nail-biting scene to watch, because I had no idea what would happen next or who would die.

Plus One is loaded with a lot of noticeable problems, but I’d be lying to you if I said I didn’t have a lot of fun (I  laughed my ass off, when the buffet woman used a flying karate kick) with this one. Watching Plus One is like watching a flaming train wreck with a fireworks show in the background, and a bear on a unicycle juggling, it’s almost impossible to look away. The hectic mashup of sci-fi elements, a love story, and a party movie will probably annoy most people. But for me, Plus One is still an ambitious and bold sci-fi thriller, that takes a lot of risky chances with hopes of being something different, and I apprentice the effort.

Rating: 7/10


Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

And remember Amazon offers free Kindle App downloads for various platforms. Follow this link to find out more- http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

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Saturday, September 28, 2013

The Colony (2013)(Minor Spoilers Review)



**This review contains MINOR spoilers, no major twists, reveals or surprises are included in this review**

In the future, survivors of the next ice age are forced to live in an underground outpost. Led by a former Army solider named Briggs (Laurence Fishburne) with the help of his lieutenant, Mason (Bill Paxton), Colony 7 is running low on resources, while trying to contain the outbreak of a deadly flu.

But Briggs focuses his attention on another problem, when Colony 5 doesn’t return daily check-up calls. After numerous failed attempts to receive a transmission, Briggs assembles a team including Sam (Kevin Zegers), Graydon (Atticus Dean Mitchell), and himself to investigate the problems with Colony 5. In his absence, Briggs leaves Mason in charge of the colony. With no one to control or put a stop to Mason’s tirades, Sam’s girlfriend, Kai (Charlotte Sullivan) fears the worst for sick members of Colony 7.

At Colony 5’s outpost, the team finds a frightened survivor, and things only get worse, when Colony 7’s team uncovers the horrifying reason behind Colony 5’s decimated population..........

Capable cast at best. Bill Paxton delivers the best performance, as the grizzled and pissed off veteran, who seemingly hates everyone. I got the sense Fishburne was just phoning it in for the most part, but Zegers and Sullivan do their best with strong efforts. Can’t say too much about the leader (Dru Viergever) of the cannibals, because his character doesn’t receive any spoken dialogue, just a lot of growling and screaming.

Usually, I’m willing to overlook predictability, and The Colony features a handful of scenes with nasty, bloody, and gruesome gore, but The Colony is a pretty lousy film. Tedious pacing, predictable and anticlimactic character deaths, too many plot holes, too many boring moments, and the action sequences are mediocre at best. Unfortunately, The Colony is a formulaic and generic sci-fi/post-apocalyptic thriller, that’s void of any guilty pleasure fun. And the premise isn’t bad, but it’s something you’ve probably seen a thousand times over (i.e. a band of small survivors fighting an unexpected and malicious threat in the aftermath of an apocalyptic disaster).

Rating: 2/10


Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

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The Colony (2013)(Spoiler Review)



**This review contains spoilers**

In the future, survivors of the next ice age are forced to live in an underground outpost. Led by a former Army solider named Briggs (Laurence Fishburne) with the help of his lieutenant, Mason (Bill Paxton), Colony 7 is running low on resources, while trying to contain the outbreak of a deadly flu. Briggs believes in a more diplomatic approach to handling the flu, including a sealed quarantine ward for the sick, and if the sick don’t show any signs of improvement, Briggs allows the choice of execution, or a long walk in the endless snowstorm. Mason on the other hand, believes in more drastic measures by skipping straight to the execution without any discussions, and no questions asked.

But Briggs focuses his attention on another problem, when Colony 5 doesn’t return daily check-up calls. After numerous failed attempts to receive a transmission, Briggs assembles a team including Sam (Kevin Zegers), Graydon (Atticus Dean Mitchell), and himself to investigate the problems with Colony 5. Reluctantly, Briggs leaves Mason in charge of the colony. With no one to control or put a stop to Mason’s tirades, Sam’s girlfriend, Kai (Charlotte Sullivan) fears the worst for sick members of Colony 7.

At Colony 5’s outpost, the team finds a frightened survivor, and things only get worse, when Colony 7’s team uncovers the horrifying reason behind Colony 5’s decimated population: with no more food left, Colony 5 turned to cannibalism to survive. Briggs, Sam, and Graydon try to escape the gruesome scene of the messy killing floor, but the odds aren’t in their favor, as they outrun and fight off the attacks from Colony 5’s mutated cannibals.

Capable cast at best. Bill Paxton delivers the best performance, as the grizzled and pissed off veteran, who seemingly hates everyone. I got the sense Fishburne was just phoning it in for the most part, but Zegers and Sullivan do their best with strong efforts. Can’t say too much about the leader (Dru Viergever) of the cannibals, because his character doesn’t receive any spoken dialogue, just a lot of growling and screaming.

Unanswered questions are a big problem for The Colony.  So the outbreak of a deadly flu is the main concern at first, but once they introduce the cannibals, the epidemic of the flu becomes insignificant? Okay, the remaining survivors at Colony 5 are cannibals, but they’re not ordinary cannibals. They have discolored pupils and fangs, so how did the mutation happen? Is the flu the source of the transformation? They never give the slightest effort to explain any of this.

Weather machines are used to control the climate in the future, but the vast majority of weather machines froze……but SOMEHOW there’s still one functioning weather machine left? At Colony 5’s outpost, Sam is able to find the video for a broken transmission about another colony’s operational weather machine (and you can clearly see sunlight in the background of the video). Using this information, Sam gathers some remaining fruit and vegetable seeds, and the remaining survivors of Colony 7 embark on a mission to join the other colony, so they can plant and grow the seeds. So during an ice age, when every other weather machine in the world is frozen solid, ONE weather machine managed to miraculously survive the cold, is working without any problems, and there’s plenty of sunlight in this specific region? Yeah, bullshit.

Usually, I’m willing to overlook predictability, and The Colony features a handful of scenes with nasty, bloody, and gruesome gore (with Sam literally slicing the cannibal leader’s head in half being the highlight), but The Colony is a pretty lousy film. Tedious pacing, predictable and anticlimactic character deaths, too many plot holes, too many boring moments, and the action sequences are mediocre at best. Unfortunately, The Colony is a formulaic and generic sci-fi/post-apocalyptic thriller, that’s void of any guilty pleasure fun. And the premise isn’t bad, but it’s something you’ve probably seen a thousand times over (i.e. a band of small survivors fighting an unexpected and malicious threat in the aftermath of an apocalyptic disaster).

Rating: 2/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

And remember Amazon offers free Kindle App downloads for various platforms. Follow this link to find out more- http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

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Friday, September 27, 2013

Take Me Home Tonight (2011)(Minor Spoilers Review)


**This review contains MINOR spoilers, no big surprises, plot twists, or details are revealed in this review **

In 1980’s Los Angeles, a Young Matt Franklin (Topher Grace) tries to win the heart of  his high school crush, Tori Frederking (Teresa Palmer) with the help of his twin sister, Wendy (Anna Faris), and his best friend, Barry Nathan (Dan Fogler). Working at a Suncoast Video store within the local mall after graduating from MIT, Matt is under pressure from his father, Bill (Micahel Biehn), who also works nights as a police officer, to do something meaningful with his life before it’s too late. Meanwhile, Matt tries to warn Wendy about her boyfriend Kyle Masterson’s (Chris Pratt) controlling habits, and his dreams to confine Wendy to the life of a common housewife.

During Kyle’s annual Labor Day bash, Matt plans to make his move on Tori by devising a plan to convince her of a career at Goldman Sachs as a big time player, and his new and fancy car (which Barry stole), a red Mercedes-Benz convertible. Matt begs the help of an old friend named Carlos (Demetri Martin), who is also a current Goldman Sachs employee, to convince Tori. But Matt runs into a series of problems during the big night, and with a need to conqueror his fears in more ways than one, Matt contemplates taking the risk of riding The Ball.

Looking for a new, exciting, and refreshing romantic comedy/coming of age film? Well, you should look somewhere else, because Take Me Home Tonight isn’t for you. Take Me Home Tonight features the common set of characters you would expect in a coming of age film. Matt is your typical shy and nerdy male teenager, who’s awkward and nervous around women, and he’s trying to break out of his shell, so he can become a man. Tori is the seemingly unattainable perfect ten, who everyone man dreams of being with. Kyle is the meathead/jock, and he’s a bully with a superficial ego. And Barry is the bumbling fool of a sidekick.

Don’t expect any genuine surprises either. Once Matt tells the truth to Tori, you know what’s going to happen. Tori will hate Matt’s guts for a while, but Matt will redeem himself with a big speech (or in this case speeches) at the end, and Tori will forgive him.

Take Me Home Tonight is predictable as predictable can be, but I still love this film. Grace provides one of the best performances I’ve seen from him, as this lost and confused screw-up, who’s trying to find his way in the world. Michael Biehn is a suitable fit for the stern father, Faris and Pratt share some great chemistry as a couple (not surprising, because they’re a couple in real life too), and her performance isn’t something special, but Palmer has the right look for the “dream girl.” Fogler is annoying as shit more often than not, but he has a few funny moments (“he’s got no testes left!”) throughout the movie. Demetri Martin’s screen time is limited, but he’s hilarious, as the paraplegic with an ironic sense of humor. Michael Ian Black’s Pete Bering is good for a few laughs, as Tori’s perverted, geeky, and slimy boss. And I can't forget about Lucy Punch's Shelly. Punch portrays this nutty, delusional, and obsessive stalker, who follows Matt around throughout the night with the hopes of a one night stand. Punch is limited to sporadic appearances, but she provides a nice touch of quirky humor as Shelly during her limited screen time.

Take Me Home Tonight is loaded with a lot of authentic 80’s nostalgia (everything from the intro, to the music, the hairstyles, the cars, the clothes, dances, and the lone Scarface reference), and if (that’s a big IF) you’re willing to overlook the predictability, you can have a lot of fun with this one. Yeah, I know. There’s a good chance a lot of people will roll their eyes at Palmer’s Tori, because some will have a hard time believing in one person being so gullible, and well, stupid, as Matt randomly pulls all of these lies out of left field, while improvising a backstory step by step for his fake career at Goldman Sachs.

Rating: 8/10

Still, Take Me Home Tonight features a rock solid cast, consistent laughs, and despite all the negativity surrounding this film, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t so unbearably bad to the point, where you can‘t stand to watch it. Take Me Home Tonight won’t raise the bar for coming of age films and romantic comedies, but if you’re looking for a real chance to have some fun and laugh, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t a bad choice.

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

And remember Amazon offers free Kindle App downloads for various platforms. Follow this link to find out more- http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

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Take Me Home Tonight (2011)(Spoiler Review)

**This review contains spoilers**

In 1980’s Los Angeles, a young Matt Franklin (Topher Grace) is still trying to find himself. Four years after his high school graduation, Matt is still working at a Suncoast Video store within the local mall. Matt, unsure of his future, recently graduated from MIT, but Matt’s father, Bill (Michael Biehn), who also works nights as a police officer, doesn’t like the idea of Matt wasting precious time and his hard earned life savings by working a dead end job. But Matt focuses all of his energy on a new goal, when his high school crush, Tori Frederking (Teresa Palmer) strolls into Suncoast Video one day.

Meanwhile, Matt’s twin sister, Wendy (Anna Faris), is dreading the thought of another rejection letter after applying to the University Of Cambridge. But Matt is more worried about the reaction from Wendy’s controlling and overbearing boyfriend, Kyle Masterson (Chris Pratt), because Matt knows Kyle will do anything to keep Wendy from chasing her dreams, so she can settle for the life of a common housewife.

Before the night of Kyle’s annual Labor Day bash, Matt’s best friend, Barry Nathan (Dan Fogler) is fired from his job as a car salesman, but later that night, Barry decides to steal a red Mercedes-Benz convertible from the lot for revenge. With Wendy’s help, and an old friend from high school named Carlos (Demetri Martin), who is also a current Goldman Sachs employee, Matt devises a plan to convince Tori of a wealthy lifestyle, including his brand new Mercedes-Benz, and Matt’s successful career as a big time player at Goldman Sachs.

Although, Matt runs into some unexpected problems at Kyle’s party, when Barry finds a bag of cocaine in the Mercedes’ glove compartment, and Matt’s conscience gets the best of him after a romantic night with Tori. But Matt seizes the opportunity for one final chance to prove himself, and earn a second chance from Tori after he volunteers to ride The Ball with Kyle behind the driver’s seat.

Looking for a new, exciting, and refreshing romantic comedy/coming of age film? Well, you should look somewhere else, because Take Me Home Tonight isn’t for you. Take Me Home Tonight features the common set of characters you would expect in a coming of age film. Matt is your typical shy and nerdy male teenager, who’s awkward and nervous around women, and he’s trying to break out of his shell, so he can become a man. Tori is the seemingly unattainable perfect ten, who everyone man dreams of being with. Kyle is the meathead/jock, and he’s a bully with a superficial ego. And Barry is the bumbling fool of a sidekick.

Don’t expect any genuine surprises either. Once Matt tells the truth to Tori, you know what’s going to happen. Tori will hate Matt’s guts for a while, but Matt will redeem himself with a big speech (or in this case speeches) at the end, and Tori will forgive him. Tori sparks a fire in Matt, when she dismisses him as a another “scared little boy,” so Matt takes Tori’s insult as a challenge, and he decides to ride The Ball. Long story short, The Ball is a big metallic ball, and the person inside has to ride it out, as The Ball rolls down a steep hill, once the driver releases The Ball by backing up in a pickup truck. Anyway, Matt’s act of bravery wins Tori’s heart, and she gives him a kiss and her phone number to end the movie.

Take Me Home Tonight is predictable as predictable can be, but I still love this film. Grace provides one of the best performances I’ve seen from him, as this lost and confused screw-up, who’s trying to find his way in the world. Michael Biehn is a suitable fit for the stern father, Faris and Pratt share some great chemistry as a couple (not surprising, because they’re a couple in real life too), and her performance isn’t something special, but Palmer has the right look for the “dream girl.” Fogler is annoying as shit more often than not, but he has a few funny moments (“he’s got no testes left!”) throughout the movie. Demetri Martin’s screen time is limited, but he’s hilarious, as the paraplegic with an ironic sense of humor. Michael Ian Black’s Pete Bering is good for a few laughs, as Tori’s perverted, geeky, and slimy boss. And I can't forget about Lucy Punch's Shelly. Punch portrays this nutty, delusional, and obsessive stalker, who follows Matt around throughout the night with the hopes of a one night stand. Punch is limited to sporadic appearances, but she provides a nice touch of quirky humor as Shelly during her limited screen time.  

For me, Take Me Home Tonight has enough likeable characters, who you can root for to overlook the formulaic pattern here. Matt’s speech before he rides The Ball is a good example. Matt takes all that frustration, fear, and rage, and with one speech, he opens up about what most kids are feeling after they graduate high school (i.e. the fear of a new world, and growing up). 

Faris tones down her usual over the top and goofy persona to portray the nagging and rival twin sister role (she’s still funny, though). But Wendy has one of the better feel good moments, when she finally stands up to Kyle by calling off the planned marriage, and dumping Kyle after Wendy realizes Kyle is more concerned with stroking his own ego. Pratt’s Kyle being a major douchebag and crying afterwards helps, but Faris’ deserves most of the credit for her stern and straightforward delivery.

Take Me Home Tonight is loaded with a lot of authentic 80’s nostalgia (everything from the intro, to the music, the hairstyles, the cars, the clothes, dances, and the lone Scarface reference), and if (that’s a big IF) you’re willing to overlook the predictability, you can have a lot of fun with this one. Yeah, I know. There’s a good chance a lot of people will roll their eyes at Palmer’s Tori, because some will have a hard time believing in one person being so gullible, and well, stupid, as Matt randomly pulls all of these lies out of left field, while improvising a backstory step by step for his fake career at Goldman Sachs.

Still, Take Me Home Tonight features a rock solid cast, consistent laughs, and despite all the negativity surrounding this film, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t so unbearably bad to the point, where you can‘t stand to watch it. Take Me Home Tonight won’t raise the bar for coming of age films and romantic comedies, but if you’re looking for a real chance to have some fun and laugh, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t a bad choice.

Rating: 8/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

And remember Amazon offers free Kindle App downloads for various platforms. Follow this link to find out more- http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

And don't forget to like both of my Facebook pages, because the Mitch MacReady 2 Facebook page includes quotes from both ebooks that can't fit into Tweets-

https://www.facebook.com/mitch.macready

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Saturday, September 21, 2013

Bait/Bait 3D (2012) (Spoiler Review)


**This review contains spoilers**

On an Australian beach one day, a lifeguard named Rory (Richard Brancatisano) is out in the water, unaware of an impending shark attack. Meanwhile, Rory’s best friend and fellow lifeguard, Josh (Xavier Samuel) is on the beach with his new fiancé and Rory’s sister, Tina (Sharni Vinson). As the shark devours the first victim, Josh tries to save Rory before it’s too late. Using a jet ski, Josh is able to speed through the calamity in the water, but Rory is mangled to death by the shark before Josh has a chance to save him.

After a year passes, Josh, too traumatized to work as a lifeguard anymore, settles for a job at a local supermarket. Depressed and unable to forget about the past, Josh sees a chance to start over, when Tina strolls into the supermarket one day with her new friend, Steven (Qi Yuwu). But Josh doesn’t have time to reconnect, because his boss and the store manager, Jessup (Adrian Pang) interrupts the happy moment.

Meanwhile, in the same supermarket, Jaimie (Phoebe Tonkin) jeopardizes her boyfriend, Ryan’s (Alex Russell) job, when she’s caught shoplifting by the supermarket’s security guard and Jessup. Jaime is lucky enough to have her father Todd (Martin Sacks), who is also a police officer, receive the call for an arrest, but Todd decides to give his daughter a slap on the wrist instead. In the parking garage, Doyle (Julian McMahon) and Kirby (Dan Wyllie) plan a robbery to steal all the cash from the safe inside Jessup’s office, but Todd is able to foil the robbery. In the same parking garage, Kyle (Lincoln Lewis) pushes his girlfriend, Heather (Cariba Heine) to fool around in their BMW. And unbeknownst to Kyle and Heather, Ryan is in the garage working on his hippie van.

Out of nowhere, a giant tsunami wave destroys most of the city, while flooding the supermarket. To make matters worse, two twelve foot Great White Sharks swim into the chaos, with one circling the parking garage, and the other lurking inside the flooded supermarket. With a severely injured Todd unable to walk, the surviving group includes Josh, Tina, Steven, Jaimie, Doyle, Kirby, Jessup, and others with Ryan, Kyle, and Heather stranded in the parking garage. Josh assumes the role of leader, but he’ll have to overcome his fear of sharks, and some bitter feelings towards Tina to survive and ensure the safety of the group.

Weird, weird cast here. On one hand, you have Vinson, Samuel, McMahon, Tonkin, and Sacks, who all deliver decent to solid performances, with Vinson providing the best overall performance in the cast. But on the flip-side, you have so many terrible and mediocre performances to drag the movie down, with Pang being one of the worst.

And on top of that, the bad side of the cast has one too many unlikable and annoying characters. Heather is a run-of-the-mill narcissistic, whiny, and materialistic girlfriend, who shows too much concern for protecting her little dog, Bully. Kyle is a meathead jock/douchebag, Jessup is the overbearing boss, and Kirby is the sleazy thief/wannabe tough guy. As far as Rory goes, yeah his character is important, but it’s not fair to judge Brancatisano’s performance, because his character completely disappears after the shark attack.

Bait includes every typical and clichéd character you can think of in a horror survival film, where the main characters are barricaded inside a seemingly inescapable death trap:

-The uncooperative whiner (Jessup), who complains about everything.

-The one selfish person (kirby), who does something to jeopardize the safety of the group, so they can have a better chance of saving their own ass.

-The one person, who goes off on his own to fix a problem (in this case it’s Steven cutting off the power, so broken and live cables won’t hit the water), and of course, something goes wrong, and Steven dies.

-The tough and resourceful hard ass (Doyle), who miraculously pieces together some random contraption to save the day. Or he’s the guy, who comes up with most of (if not all of) the plans.

-The brave hero (Josh), who constantly risks his life to save everyone, while assuming the role of leader in the group

-And of course, you have someone, who’s suffering from a serious injury (Todd). But they don’t want to hold the team back, so they try to contribute, but they can’t……and in the grand scheme of things, Todd is still the weak link in the team.

Predictability is a big problem for Bait. You can see everything coming, and it’s not hard to predict every event in the entire movie step by step after the opening scene. You knew Jaimie would eventually change her attitude, and do something brave and selfless to prove to her father she’s capable of changing, and she did (Jaime jumps into the water to lure a shark towards her, giving Josh and the others time to set up a trap). You could see Steven’s death coming, Josh and Tina trusting each other again and becoming a couple didn’t surprise me, and for being such jerks, you knew Kirby, Kyle, and Jessup would suffer horrible, agonizing deaths, and they did.

But I’ll give Bait credit for a few eye-catching images. The next to final shot of the movie shows Josh and Tina holding hands, while they’re standing together with the other remaining survivors, and looking on in horror at the devastation the tsunami caused. Watching this one shot, you really feel the sense of relief for the survivors fighting and struggling to overcome more than one close call. Also, the final shot of the movie shows a shark randomly jumping out of the water to devour a flying seagull for a “it’s not over yet” cliffhanger. All of my complaints aside, it was a nice way to close out the movie.

And to be fair, Bait never tries to be too complex, and making a smart horror film wasn‘t the goal here. Bait should give gore fiends everything they want and more, and for a low budget film, the special effects aren’t that bad. In the end, Bait provides enough bloody carnage and gruesome, gory deaths to warrant a guilty pleasure pass. So yeah, if you’re looking for some passable dumb fun, and if you’re into shark attack horror movies, Bait is worth a try.

Rating: 5/10

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Bait/Bait 3D (2012) (Minor Spoiler Review)


**This review contains MINOR spoilers**

At a supermarket in Australia, a small band of survivors are trapped inside a flooded supermarket after a giant tsunami wave destroys the city. The surviving group including, Tina (Sharni Vinson), Josh (Xavier Samuel), Doyle (Julian McMahon), Todd (Martin Sacks), Steven (Qi Yuwu), Jaimie (Phoebe Tonkin), Ryan (Alex Russell), Jessup (Adrian Pang), Kirby (Dan Wyllie), and others will have to put aside their differences and work together to survive.

In the parking garage, Kyle (Lincoln Lewis) and Heather (Cariba Heine) try to use their BMW as shelter, but they’re forced to find another way out after the windows crack. Both groups are caught up in bickering and finger pointing, but a bigger problem emerges, when two twelve foot Great White Sharks swim into the supermarket and parking garage.

Weird, weird cast here. On one hand, you have Vinson, Samuel, McMahon, Tonkin, and Sacks, who all deliver decent to solid performances, with Vinson providing the best overall performance in the cast. But on the flip-side, you have so many terrible and mediocre performances to drag the movie down, with Pang being one of the worst. And on top of that, the bad side of the cast has one too many unlikable and annoying characters.

Bait includes every typical and clichéd character you can think of in a horror survival film, where the main characters are barricaded inside a seemingly inescapable death trap:

-The uncooperative whiner, who complains about everything.

-The one selfish person, who does something to jeopardize the safety of the group, so they can have a better chance of saving their own ass.

-The one person, who goes off on his own to fix a problem (in this case it’s cutting off the power, so broken and live cables won’t hit the water), and of course, something goes wrong, and that person dies.

-The tough and resourceful hard ass, who miraculously pieces together some random contraption to save the day. Or he’s the guy, who comes up with most of (if not all of) the plans.

-The brave hero, who constantly risks his life to save everyone, while assuming the role of leader in the group

-And of course, you have someone, who’s suffering from a serious injury. But they don’t want to hold the team back, so they try to contribute, but they can’t……and in the grand scheme of things, they’re still the weak link in the team.

Predictability is a big problem for Bait. You can see everything coming, and it’s not hard to predict every event in the entire movie step by step after the opening scene. But to be fair, Bait never tries to be too complex, and making a smart horror film wasn‘t the goal here. Bait should give gore fiends everything they want and more, and for a low budget film, the special effects aren’t that bad. In the end, Bait provides enough bloody carnage and gruesome, gory deaths to warrant a guilty pleasure pass. So yeah, if you’re looking for some passable dumb fun, and if you’re into shark attack horror movies, Bait is worth a try.

Rating: 5/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

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Thursday, September 19, 2013

The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones (2013) (Spoiler Review)


**This review contains spoilers**

Living in New York City, Clary Fray (Lily Collins) struggles to comprehend a strange and bizarre obsession with seeing mysterious symbols in various places. Clary’s mother, Jocelyn (Lena Headey) realizes her worst fears have come to life, but before she has a chance to explain the truth to her daughter, Joeclyn is attacked by an intruder.

One night, Clary pushes her nerdy best friend, Simon Lewis (Robert Sheehan) to go into into a night club after Clary spots the mysterious symbol on the entrance sign again. Inside the club, Clary witnesses a man named Jace Wayland (Jaime Campbell Bower) use his sword to kill a man, but Clary’s frightened screams are met with confused looks, because no one else was able to see the murder.

Clary’s mother is taken hostage after the attack, and Luke Garroway (Aidan Turner), Jocelyn’s best friend, who also lives with Clary and Jocelyn, mysteriously disappears. After seeing the ruins of her ravaged apartment in the aftermath of the attack, Clary is saved by Jace, who manages to kill a demon before it kills Clary. Eventually, Clary learns the truth about her true identity: like her mother, Clary is a a Shadowhunter, a warrior sworn to a life of killing demons and other malevolent forces, who hide in other forms (humans, animals, etc.) on Earth. 

Simon tags along with Clary and Jace, as Clary embarks on a mission to learn more about her past, and rescue her mother. At the secret headquarters for Shadowhunters, invisible to all Mundanes (normal humans), Clary and Simon meet Alec (Kevin Zegers) and Isabelle (Jemima West) Lightwood, a brother/sister duo of Shadowhunters, who form a team with Jace, and their leader/veteran retired Shadowhunter, Hodge Starkweather (Jared Harris), who is confined to the innards of the base after a curse was placed on him.

Hodge explains to Clary how her mother stole the Mortal Cup, a powerful and magical instrument, to protect it from Valentine Morgenstern (Jonathan Rhys Meyers), Jocelyn’s former lover, and a Shadowhunter, who turned into a madman. Obsessed with power and control over all Shadowhunters and evil forces, Valentine planned to use the Mortal Cup to complete his goal, but with Clary’s mother incapacitated (to protect the whereabouts of the Mortal Cup, Jocelyn drank a potion that put her into a deep sleep), it’s believed the location of the hidden Cup is buried in Clary’s memories.

After he escapes the clutches of Emil Pangborn (Kevin Durand) and Samuel Blackwell (Robert Maillet), Valentine’s henchmen, and the same men, who attacked and kidnapped Jocelyn,  Luke returns to reveal himself as a werewolf, who works with the Shadowhunters (the Shadowhunters have a pact with the werewolves), because Clary will need all the help she can get to stop Valentine, and save her mother.

Lily Collins was lucky enough to land a spot in The Blind Side, but of  course, she was overshadowed by the critical acclaim for Sandra Bullock’s performance, and Bullock winning the Oscar for Best Actress and various other Best Actress awards. She hit a rough spot with that abomination Abduction (still haven‘t seen Mirror, Mirror), but despite the negative backlash for this film, I think Collins handled herself well in the leading role. With Headey’s character on the shelf for the vast majority of the film, and limited focus on the other  noticeable veteran in the cast (Jared Harris), Collins had the task of carrying the load as the main character. She’s not quite there yet, but Collins showed  some strong signs of potential here. With the story revolving around her, Collins showed poise and confidence as Clary, while showcasing an emotional side during Clary’s hard times throughout the film.

Bower is your typical pretty boy rebel/bad ass, who only shows his soft side to the ladies. Not a bad performance, but nothing too special either. Headey’s character doesn’t receive enough conscious screen time here, so it’s not fair to judge her performance (or lack there of). And Sheehan is believable in his role as the nerdy and awkward outcast. I don’t think it’s fair to judge Jonathan Rhys Meyers Valentine. His character doesn’t make an appearance until the tail end of the film, and no one else is really worth mentioning by name.

The Mortal Instruments delivered a few twists and turns I didn’t see coming. For starters, Jocelyn hiding the Mortal Cup in a tarot card was a unique surprise, because that’s the last place anyone would think of. And Valentine revealing himself as the father of Clary and Jace (real name Jonathan). The shock factor of Valentine’s reveal was strong, because before Valentine told Jace the truth, you could clearly see Jace and Clary were starting to fall in love, and things hit a peak after a Romantic night in a magical garden. Of course, this reveal might remind people of the famous scene in Return Of The Jedi, where Luke realizes Leia is his sister after a talk with Obi-Wan. Add in the awkwardness of Han and Leia being in a relationship, and the look of guilt and shock on Luke’s face, and you can easily connect the dots between both films.

The love triangle between Jace, Simon, and Clary? Yeah, it’s predictable. Simon is tired of being in the infamous friend zone, so he opens up about his true feelings for Clary. But Clary is drawn to Jace, and after that, Clary goes through the dilemma of being attracted to the more desirable guy, and the friend, who’s always been there for her no matter what. You can see it all coming from a mile away. Although, Mortal Instruments adds an unexpected layer to the love triangle, when Clary openly accuses Alec of having feelings for Jace. Alec responds by threatening her life, if she ever mentions the situation again. Some nice food for thought, and I can honestly say I didn’t see this coming.

As far as a critical reception goes, The Mortal Instruments has received a strong, negative backlash. Complaints range from The Mortal Instruments trying to be a Harry Potter or Twilight knock-off, the film borrowing elements from damn near every fantasy/action film over the past thirty years or so, and so on. Well, a lot of that’s true. The Mortal Instruments isn’t completely original, not by a long shot. But at the same time, I think it’s unfair to bash a film for mimicking other fantasy films/stories or borrowing elements from said films, because if we use this criteria to bash other movies like The Mortal Instruments, then we would have a pretty lengthy list of bad movies. And on top of that, it would be damn near impossible to rate any movie that resembles Mortal Instruments with a positive score, IF we use this criteria.

The Mortal Instruments is loaded with enough dazzling visual eye candy to bring out a few “oooohhh” and “ahhhhh” moments, and there’s a handful of  surprisingly entertaining fight sequences throughout the movie. Plus, they’re able to mix in some decent humor every now and then, and fans of the Ghostbusters films should appreciate the wink to the original film. I’ll openly admit this here and now, I went in to The Mortal Instruments with a very negative mindset, but I found myself having a lot of fun with this one as the story developed.

Rating: 6/10

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The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones (2013) (Minor Spoilers Review)


**This review contains minor spoilers, no major plot details, surprises, or reveals are mentioned in this review**

Living in New York City, Clary Fray (Lily Collins) struggles to comprehend a strange and bizarre obsession with seeing mysterious symbols in various places. Clary’s mother, Jocelyn (Lena Headey) realizes her worst fears have come to life, but before she has a chance to explain the truth to her daughter, Jocelyn is attacked by an intruder.

At a night club, Clary witnesses a man named Jace Wayland (Jaime Campbell Bower) use his sword to kill a man, but Clary’s frightened screams are met with confused looks, because no one else was able to see the murder. Why is Clary seeing symbols? Why is Clary the only one, who can see Jace? Clary’s determination to find the truth will lead her on a journey into a mysterious world to fight supernatural forces. And with the help of her best friend, Simon Lewis (Robert Sheehan), Jace, and others, Clary will uncover secrets that will change her life forever.

Lily Collins was lucky enough to land a spot in The Blind Side, but of  course, she was overshadowed by the critical acclaim for Sandra Bullock’s performance, and Bullock winning the Oscar for Best Actress and various other Best Actress awards. She hit a rough spot with that abomination Abduction (still haven‘t seen Mirror, Mirror), but despite the negative backlash for this film, I think Collins handled herself well in the leading role. With Headey’s character on the shelf for the vast majority of the film, and limited focus on the other  noticeable veteran in the cast (Jared Harris), Collins had the task of carrying the load as the main character. She’s not quite there yet, but Collins showed  some strong signs of potential here. With the story revolving around her, Collins showed poise and confidence as Clary, while showcasing an emotional side during Clary’s hard times throughout the film.

Bower is your typical pretty boy rebel/bad ass, who only shows his soft side to the ladies. Not a bad performance, but nothing too special either. Headey’s character doesn’t receive enough conscious screen time here, so it’s not fair to judge her performance (or lack there of). And Sheehan is believable in his role as the nerdy and awkward outcast.

As far as a critical reception goes, The Mortal Instruments has received a strong, negative backlash. Complaints range from The Mortal Instruments trying to be a Harry Potter or Twilight knock-off, the film borrowing elements from damn near every fantasy/action film over the past thirty years or so, and so on. Well, a lot of that’s true. The Mortal Instruments isn’t completely original, not by a long shot. But at the same time, I think it’s unfair to bash a film for mimicking other fantasy films/stories or borrowing elements from said films, because if we use this criteria to bash other movies like The Mortal Instruments, then we would have a pretty lengthy list of bad movies. And on top of that, it would be damn near impossible to rate any movie that resembles Mortal Instruments with a positive score, IF we use this criteria.

The Mortal Instruments is loaded with enough dazzling visual eye candy to bring out a few “oooohhh” and “ahhhhh” moments, and there’s a handful of  surprisingly entertaining fight sequences throughout the movie. Plus, they’re able to mix in some decent humor every now and then, and fans of the Ghostbusters films should appreciate the wink to the original film. I’ll openly admit this here and now, I went in to The Mortal Instruments with a very negative mindset, but I found myself having a lot of fun with this one as the story developed.

Rating: 6/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

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Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013) (Spoiler Review)


**This review contains spoilers**

In the 1980’s, Lorraine Lambert (Jocelin Donahue) seeks the help of a paranormal investigator named Elise (Lindsay Seim), when her young son, Josh (Garrett Ryan) experiences unexplainable phenomenons. With the help of her assistant, Carl (Hank Harris) Elise is able to find the source of Josh’s hauntings, which confirm the real presence of a ghostly woman in a black wedding dress, who appears in photos with Josh. With Elise’s help, Josh is able to block and suppress his dark childhood memories of the haunting, and the woman in the black wedding dress.

Years later as a grown man, Josh (Patrick Wilson), under the possession of the woman in the black wedding dress, murders Elise (Lin Shaye), after Josh unknowingly returned to the living world followed by the woman. Josh’s doesn’t have time to enjoy the relief and happiness after rescuing his son, Dalton (Ty Simpkins) from The Further, because with an ongoing police investigation, Josh and his family are forced to move into his child hood home, which is also his mother, Lorraine’s (Barbara Hershey) current home, while the cops inspect The Lambert’s home for clues.

But after a while, it becomes clear Josh hasn’t done enough to distance himself from the dark forces that continue to plague his life. With growing suspicions from his wife, Renai (Rose Byrne), Josh struggles to fight off the evil force, who’s trying to possess his body, and harm his sons Dalton and Foster (Andrew Astor), Renai, and Josh’s infant daughter. With Elise dead, Carl (Steve Coulter) returns with help from Elise’s trusted assistants Specs (Leigh Whannell) and Tucker (Angus Sampson). After some digging and research one thing becomes clear: the woman in the black wedding dress has returned to finish what she started with Josh, and kill off his entire family. So with his living body possessed by the woman, Josh works with Carl, and Elise’s spirit in The Further to find the answers he’ll need to save his life, and his family.

Zero complaints from the cast. Insidious was elevated by a handful of strong performances, and nothing changes here, with Rose Byrne taking the honor for the top spot. Also, Whannell and Sampson provided most of the comic relief again, as Tucker and Specs (Tucker and Specs using The Bear VS The Ninja as their version of rock-paper-scissors was hilarious). And yes, different actors and actresses portray the younger versions of the main characters (Josh, Elise, Lorraine, etc.), but Donahue and Ryan are the only two, who receive a significant amount of screen time after the intro.

I love James Wan, but Chapter 2 is lacking a lot of the atmospheric tension that made Insidious a great film. In Chapter 2, Wan gives you a more thorough and in-depth look at The Further (the spirit world where all the ghosts live). On one hand, giving the audience a step by step walk through for different parts of The Further ties up a lot of loose ends in the original, and it’s a treat for people, who wanted to see more of The Further, because Josh didn’t make the trip into The Further until the very end of the film in part one.

The bad side? The Further is not scary or spooky at all. In Insidious, the less is more approach worked better, because you didn’t see that much of The Further. In Chapter 2, about 80% of the movie takes place in The Further. Sorry, but wooden horses covered in cobwebs, rocking back and forth by themselves, ghosts with pasty make up, and a wrinkly, naked old man (the darkness covers his private parts, but he’s still naked) aren’t scary.

Which brings me to another problem in Chapter 2: too many unintentionally funny moments. The old man repeating “He’s got your baby! He’s got your baby! He’s got your baby!” is the most obvious one you’ve all seen in the trailers and TV spots, and the pale faced woman standing up, turning around, and screaming while pointing is another good example. Specs and Tucker are okay, because they’re supposed to be funny, and add some comedy for breathing room. But everything else is too much, and I can’t count the number of times I laughed, when I wasn’t supposed to.

Remember the woman in the black wedding dress, who haunted Josh in the first film? Well, she makes a return here….but she is a he. A man named Parker Crane, who was a patient of Lorraine’s, when she worked at a hospital, was tormented by his mother as a child, because she wanted a daughter. As a child, Parker’s mom forced her son to look, act, and dress like a girl. As a deranged man (for obvious reasons), Parker continued dressing like a woman, wearing make up and a black wedding dress, transforming himself into a murderer, so he could fulfill his mother’s wishes. So the pasty faced woman you all saw in the trailers is Parker’s mom, and the woman isn’t a woman. Truth be told, I enjoyed this twist. I really appreciated Chapter 2’s effort to provide a VERY thorough  back story for the woman in the black wedding dress, his mother, and the reasons behind his motivations to become a killer.

So yeah, Insidious Chapter 2 deserves a lot of credit for tying up some loose ends in the first film. I loved the first film, but it’s hard to ignore the “How did that happen?” questions that pop up every now and then. Behind the camera, Wan uses a crafty technique that blends events and footage from the first film into the present during Chapter 2, as Josh tries to retrace his steps in The Further to save his family. Chapter 2 put a lot of effort into filling in some of the holes in original, and I appreciate this approach, because you rarely (if ever) see this type of effort in sequels, especially horror sequels.

The stuff with The Further? That’s another story.  I already went on a little rant about the unscary atmosphere in Insidious’ spirit world, and things get a little bit too complex for my taste here. So apparently, Josh, as a kid, pointed his older self in the right direction to find out more information surrounding the woman in black. Okay. So apparently time travel is apart of The Further now? Because Josh (as an adult) is able to go back to the haunting events in the first film, and save his family? On top of that, we’re lead to believe Carl might be dead, because he’s in The Further. But Elise disproves this theory, because she felt Carl’s “heartbeat,”  when she hugged him?

Also, Josh, Elise, and Carl are able to watch childhood events with Parker (as a child) and his mother, and somehow, Parker’s mother has super natural powers in The Further, but Josh (a normal, living human) is stronger than Parker’s mom in her world? I know I sound really nitpicky here, but again, I think the less is more approach worked better with The Further in the last film.

Insidious had some GREAT, surprising jump scares. Chapter 2? Not so much. Wan’s jump scares were more genuinely shocking the first time around, and you couldn’t see most of them coming. One thing that annoys me to no end about mainstream PG-13 horror films is, the jump scares are so easy to telegraph, and unfortunately, Chapter 2 falls into the same trap.

But in a non-related spooky moment that doesn’t involve The Further, Wan did provide a nice chilling moment here. In the flashbacks with Lorraine as a doctor, she strolls into the elevator, and Parker (who’s visibly ill and pale) follows her. Parker doesn’t speak a word to Lorraine, and when Lorraine urges the desk clerk to check on Parker, the desk clerk informs Lorraine Parker committed suicide earlier in the day. The eerie tension with Parker and Lorraine in the elevator was unreal. I had NO idea what would happen in that elevator. Is Lorraine going to panic, scream for help, and run? Or will Parker just attack Lorraine with intentions of killing her? Because Parker tried to strangle a young Josh earlier. Good stuff.

But I’ll say this, I enjoyed the cliffhanger at the end. So Specs and Tucker are investigating a new haunting case, with Elise’s spirit guiding them. Elise approaches this comatose young woman sitting in a chair, and as she’s going through her usual steps to diagnose the problem, she stops all of the sudden. Elise sees something the cameras don’t show us, and whatever Elise saw, it scared the shit out of her. “Oh my God.” Those are Elise’s final words to close out the film, as the credits started rolling.

I’m not happy about the upcoming Insidious part 3 (more on that later), but going by this cliffhanger, it looks like they’re moving the story away from The Lambert family, and putting the focus on some new victims. Of course, it looks like Elise, Specs, and Tucker will stick around as familiar faces. I think it’s way too soon to speculate whether or not moving the story away from The Lamberts will hurt or help the Insidious franchise. But you have to think The Lambert family saga hit the expiration date here, because they really stretched the story as far as it could possibly go, including an in-depth look at Josh’s childhood here. 

Tough rating, because Chapter 2 isn’t good as the original, but it’s not horrible either. And yeah, the cast is a big reason why I won’t go with a negative score here. Is Chapter 2 worse than most horror number twos? No. No it's not, but on the flip side, it’s nothing to brag about either.

By now, I’m sure everyone knows Insidious: Chapter 2 had a strong opening weekend for a low budget horror film, and it’s official now, we’re getting an Insidious 3. Because you know, it made a lot of money, and Hollywood has to milk this franchise for everything it’s worth, right? I threw up in my mouth a little bit, when I read this news, because now, it’s only a matter of time before the Insidious franchise devolves into a mess of shit (i.e. the Saw franchise and Paranormal Activity franchise). Horror franchises don’t get better with more films. Need proof? Just a few modern examples.

Bride Of Chucky
Seed Of Chucky
Halloween: Resurrection
Halloween 2 (2009) (Zombie’s second remake)
Saw 4, 5, 6, & 7
Paranormal Activity 4

Fucking Hollywood.

Rating: 5/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

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Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013) (Minor Spoiler Review)



Spoiler review will be up tomorrow!

**This review contains minor spoilers, no surprises, reveals, or major plot twists are revealed in this review**

Following the events of Insidious, Elise (Lin Shaye) is dead, and Josh Lambert (Patrick Wilson) is the prime suspect in her murder. While the police sweep and inspect the house for clues, Josh, his wife Renai (Rose Byrne), their sons Dalton (Ty Simpkins) and Foster (Andrew Astor), and their infant daughter move into Josh’s childhood home, which is also his mother Lorraine’s (Barbara Hershey) current home.

But after Renai spots the ghost of a woman, it’s clear The Lambert’s haven’t done enough to distance themselves from The Further. With the help of Carl (Steve Coulter), another paranormal investigator and old friend of Elise, and a returning Specs (Leigh Whannell) and Tucker (Angus Sampson), The Lamberts try to rid themselves of the evil entities, who will stop at nothing to possess their souls and kill anyone, who gets in their way.

Zero complaints from the cast. Insidious was elevated by a handful of strong performances, and nothing changes here, with Rose Byrne taking the honor for the top spot. Also, Whannell and Sampson provided most of the comic relief again, as Tucker and Specs (Tucker and Specs using The Bear VS The Ninja as their version of rock-paper-scissors was hilarious).

I love James Wan, but Chapter 2 is lacking a lot of the atmospheric tension that made Insidious a great film. In Chapter 2, Wan gives you a more thorough and in-depth look at The Further (the spirit world where all the ghosts live). On one hand, giving the audience a step by step walk through for different parts of The Further ties up a lot of loose ends in the original, and it’s a treat for people, who wanted to see more of The Further, because Josh didn’t make the trip into The Further until the very end of the film in part one.

The bad side? The Further is not scary or spooky at all. In Insidious, the less is more approach worked better, because you didn’t see that much of The Further. In Chapter 2, about 80% of the movie takes place in The Further. Sorry, but wooden horses covered in cobwebs, rocking back and forth by themselves, ghosts with pasty make up, and a wrinkly, naked old man (the darkness covers his private parts, but he’s still naked) aren’t scary.

Which brings me to another problem in Chapter 2: too many unintentionally funny moments. The old man repeating “He’s got your baby! He’s got your baby! He’s got your baby!” is the most obvious one you’ve all seen in the trailers and TV spots, and the pale faced woman standing up, turning around, and screaming while pointing is another good example. Specs and Tucker are okay, because they’re supposed to be funny, and add some comedy for breathing room. But everything else is too much, and I can’t count the number of times I laughed, when I wasn’t supposed to.

Insidious had some GREAT, surprising jump scares. Chapter 2? Not so much. Wan’s jump scares were more genuinely shocking the first time around, and you couldn’t see most of them coming. One thing that annoys me to no end about mainstream PG-13 horror films is, the jump scares are so easy to telegraph, and unfortunately, Chapter 2 falls into the same trap.

Although, Insidious Chapter 2 deserves a lot of credit for tying up some loose ends in the first film. I loved the first film, but it’s hard to ignore the “How did that happen?” questions that pop up every now and then. Behind the camera, Wan uses a crafty technique that blends events and footage from the first film into the present during Chapter 2, as Josh tries to retrace his steps in The Further to save his family. Chapter 2 put a lot of effort into filling in some of the holes in original, and I appreciate this approach, because you rarely (if ever) see this type of effort in sequels, especially horror sequels.

Tough rating, because Chapter 2 isn’t good as the original, but it’s not horrible either. And yeah, the cast is a big reason why I won’t go with a negative score here. Is Chapter 2 worse than most horror number twos? No. No it's not, but on the flip side, it’s nothing to brag about either.

By now, I’m sure everyone knows Insidious: Chapter 2 had a strong opening weekend for a low budget horror film, and it’s official now, we’re getting an Insidious 3. Because you know, it made a lot of money, and Hollywood has to milk this franchise for everything it’s worth, right? I threw up in my mouth a little bit, when I read this news, because now, it’s only a matter of time before the Insidious franchise devolves into a mess of shit (i.e. the Saw franchise and Paranormal Activity franchise). Horror franchises don’t get better with more films. Need proof? Just a few modern examples.

Bride Of Chucky
Seed Of Chucky
Halloween: Resurrection
Halloween 2 (2009) (Zombie’s second remake)
Saw 4, 5, 6, & 7
Paranormal Activity 4

Fucking Hollywood.

Rating: 5/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

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Monday, September 16, 2013

Bereavement (2010) (Minor Spoiler Review)



**This review contains MINOR spoilers, but no major plot twists, or surprises are revealed in this review.**

It’s 1989, and within the small town of Minersville, Pennsylvania, a local recluse named Graham Sutter (Brett Rickaby) lures a young Martin Bristol (Spencer List) away from his mother and the swing set in his backyard with the promise of a new bicycle. At the abandoned meat packing plant, where Graham worked with his father as a child, Graham forces Martin to witness his secret life as a serial killer, as Graham kidnaps, tortures, and murders young women within the plant. Too horrified to speak, and suffering from a rare condition where he’s unable to feel physical pain, Martin is forced into a life of being Graham’s pupil/assistant, as Graham continues his killing spree, while worshiping the skeletal remains in a shrine that include a bull’s skull.

Five years later, Allison Miller (Alexandra Daddario) arrives in Minersville to live with her uncle Jonathan Miller (Michael Biehn), his wife Karen (Kathryn Meisle), and their daughter Wendy (Peyton List). Allison is forced into her new life, because she had nowhere else to go after her parents were killed in a car accident by an SUV. Lonely and heartbroken, Allison forms a bond with a troubled local teen named William (Nolan Gerard Funk).

Meanwhile, Graham continues his secret life as a serial killer of young women with Martin at as his side. But moving on will be the least of Allison’s worries. One day, Allison accidentally spots Martin in the abandoned meat packing plant while jogging, and Allison’s curiosity will put her on a dangerous collision course with Graham.

Looking for a significant amount of spotlight on Michael Biehn? Don’t get your hopes up and don’t let the box cover fool you, because Biehn is the only actor with any real name value here, so they had to use the only form of star power they had to sell the movie. Biehn’s character is pushed into the background here, because the vast majority of focus goes to Allison, Graham, and Martin.

Daddario is believable in her role, as the lost teen, who’s looking for someone to bond with, and although he doesn’t speak a word here, List did a wonderful job of conveying his emotions through facial expressions (a lot of the cold, heartless stares towards the end) and body language. And Brett Rickaby is spot on as the delusional and bloodthirsty sociopath. Rickaby does a great job of selling Graham’s outrage (“WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME!”) and his dedication to the shrine, and he’s able to convince you Graham is this delusional nutcase, who believes he’s doing the right thing (or a sort of cleansing service for mankind). Also, Bereavement is loaded with a handful of ear shattering scream queens (including Daddario). No joke, I had to turn the volume down a few times, because my ear drums couldn’t take it.

Writer/director Stevan Mena slowly merges both storylines together. On one hand, you have Allison trying to adjust to her new life, and move on after the death of her parents. On the other, you have Graham grooming and training Martin to be a cold-blooded killer. Mena does a good job of smoothly merging both storylines together, creating a hectic and suspenseful finale at the end. Plus, Mena deserves some credit for creating a few spooky atmospherics.

Of course, Bereavement isn’t perfect. One gaping hole in logic that bothered me, is how NOBODY in this small and quiet little town noticed the odd behavior of the creepy recluse, who drives around in a old, beat up black van. Still, Bereavement is a solid entry into the Indy American horror scene. Mena doesn’t go overboard with the blood, gore, and nasty stuff. He shows just enough to gross you out, and I usually appreciate this approach more, because this approach plays with the “OUCH! That had to hurt! Or “Wow. That must’ve been PAINFUL” side of your imagination.

Rating: 7/10

Both ebooks are back with new covers!

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

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Bereavement (2010) (Spoiler Review)


**This review contains spoilers**

It’s 1989, and within the small town of Minersville, Pennsylvania, a local recluse named Graham Sutter (Brett Rickaby) lures a young Martin Bristol (Spencer List) away from his mother and the swing set in his backyard with the promise of a new bicycle. At the abandoned meat packing plant, where Graham worked with his father as a child, Graham forces Martin to witness his secret life as a serial killer, as Graham kidnaps, tortures, and murders young women within the plant. Too horrified to speak, and suffering from a rare condition where he’s unable to feel physical pain, Martin is forced into a life of being Graham’s pupil/assistant, as Graham continues his killing spree, while worshiping the skeletal remains in a shrine that include a bull’s skull.

Five years later, Allison Miller (Alexandra Daddario) arrives in Minersville to live with her uncle Jonathan Miller (Michael Biehn), his wife Karen (Kathryn Meisle), and their daughter Wendy (Peyton List). Allison is forced into her new life, because she had nowhere else to go after her parents were killed in a car accident by an SUV. Lonely and heartbroken, Allison forms a bond with a troubled local teen named William (Nolan Gerard Funk).

Meanwhile, Graham continues his secret life as a serial killer of young women with Martin at as his side. But moving on will be the least of Allison’s worries. One day, Allison accidentally spots Martin in the abandoned meat packing plant while jogging, and Allison’s curiosity will put her on a dangerous collision course with Graham.

Looking for a significant amount of spotlight on Michael Biehn? Don’t get your hopes up and don’t let the box cover fool you, because Biehn is the only actor with any real name value here, so they had to use the only form of star power they had to sell the movie. Biehn’s character is pushed into the background here, because the vast majority of focus goes to Allison, Graham, and Martin.

Daddario is believable in her role, as the lost teen, who’s looking for someone to bond with, and although he doesn’t speak a word here, List did a wonderful job of conveying his emotions through facial expressions (a lot of the cold, heartless stares towards the end) and body language. And Brett Rickaby is spot on as the delusional and bloodthirsty sociopath. Rickaby does a great job of selling Graham’s outrage (“WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME!”) and his dedication to the shrine, and he’s able to convince you Graham is this delusional nutcase, who believes he’s doing the right thing (or a sort of cleansing service for mankind). Also, Bereavement is loaded with a handful of ear shattering scream queens (including Daddario). No joke, I had to turn the volume down a few times, because my ear drums couldn’t take it.

Writer/director Stevan Mena slowly merges both storylines together. On one hand, you have Allison trying to adjust to her new life, and move on after the death of her parents. On the other, you have Graham grooming and training Martin to be a cold-blooded killer. Mena does a good job of smoothly merging both storylines together, creating a hectic and suspenseful finale at the end. Plus, Mena deserves some credit for creating a few spooky atmospherics. A prime example of a spooky setting would be Martin’s dream of finally escaping Graham. Martin is running for his life, until he stops in an open field. Martin stops in his tracks, when he spots the bull skull shrine Graham worships in the distance….and the bull skull quickly turns to make eye contact with Martin. After that, Martin snaps out of it, and he awakes in the real world. Eerie stuff.

Truth be told, I wasn’t too crazy about Bereavement, until the finale started to unfold. Don’t get me wrong, I was enjoying Bereavement, but nothing blew me away. But when Allison decides to go after Martin inside the meat packing plant on a rescue mission, I was hooked in, and I couldn’t take my eyes off the screen. Graham eventually returns, captures Allison, and congratulates Martin for the setup. Allison is locked inside a freezer, and it looks like William is about to rescue her…..but Graham sneaks up from behind him, and bashes William’s head in with a shovel.

Back at the Miller household, Graham decides to tie up any loose ends by burning down the house with the Miller’s dead bodies inside, so no one else will suspect anything fishy. After she escapes the meat packing plant with Martin, Allison tries to call 911, while the house is burning….but Martin pops out of a closet, and he brutally stabs Allison to death. Mena deserves credit for this genuinely surprising swerve, because I can honestly say Martin killing Allison caught me off guard. You could see Martin turning on Graham coming from a mile away, and he did (Martin kills Graham at the end), but killing Allsion? No way. I mean, it’s only natural to believe this young kid would  be overly grateful for the savior, who FINALLY rescued him from the clutches of the madman, who traumatized him and ruined his life, right?  That’s why Martin killing Allison was such a huge shock, because logic leads you to believe Martin wouldn’t hesitate to leave a life of murder and torture behind him.

My only complaint about the finale is Michael Biehn’s unceremonious death. Jonathan goes to Graham’s house to find Allison after she disappears. Graham denies ever seeing Allison, but Allison screams for her uncle. Graham gets a shotgun, and he kills Jonathan by putting a giant hole in his chest. Jonathan’s end was so abrupt and out of left field, and Biehn easily receives the most underwhelming and disappointing death in Bereavement.

Of course, Bereavement isn’t perfect. One gaping hole in logic that bothered me, is how NOBODY in this small and quiet little town noticed the odd behavior of the creepy recluse, who drives around in a old, beat up black van. Still, Bereavement is a solid entry into the Indy American horror scene. Mena doesn’t go overboard with the blood, gore, and nasty stuff. He shows just enough to gross you out, and I usually appreciate this approach more, because this approach plays with the “OUCH! That had to hurt! Or “Wow. That must’ve been PAINFUL” side of your imagination.

Rating: 7/10

Both ebooks are back with new covers!

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

And don't forget to like both of my Facebook pages, because the Mitch MacReady 2 Facebook page includes quotes from both ebooks that can't fit into Tweets-

https://www.facebook.com/mitch.macready

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Announcement- Spoiler & Non-Spoiler Reviews!

That's right. From now on, I will be posting two sets of movie reviews for each film: ones that include spoilers, and ones with minor, or no spoilers at all. When I say minor spoilers, said review will just have a plot synopsis that introduces you to the main characters, backgrounds for the main characters, setting, and story. But I won't give away any major plot details or twists.

With minor spoiler reviews, I'll try to limit everything to what you see in the trailers and TV spots, without giving anything major away. Unless it's a trailer like Dream House, which gives away the entire movie. lol. A recent example of a completely spoiler free review would be my review of Jobs, and I'll be sure to specify which is a minor and completely spoiler free review, or if the review is full of spoilers in the sub-heading.

MMR

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Jobs (2013)


**Spoiler free review!**

Well, I’ll just get this out of the way first: Ashton Kutcher is surprisingly entertaining in the leading role. Kutcher gave an admirable effort in Jobs. He really dedicated himself to this role 100%, you can clearly see it (i.e. Kutcher mimicking Jobs movements, which include the abnormal walking style of a gangly man), and it’s a rare occurrence, but Kutcher’s performance isn’t the biggest problem here, not by a long shot.

Rest of the cast ranges from so-so to solid. Josh Gad is entertaining and adds most of the comic relief in his usual role of the awkward and nerdy outcast, and as you would expect, J.K. Simmons is a nice fit for the demanding and overbearing authority figure. Plus, Dermont  Mulroney and Matthew Modine are believable in their roles, as the clean cut and slimy businessmen, who won’t hesitate  to stab you in the back. James Woods has a role here, but it’s limited to cameo status.

The direction of Jobs constantly strays into two territories, creating too much confusion to the point where I asked myself two questions throughout the movie: is Jobs trying to be a biopic about Steve Jobs? Or is Jobs trying to be a docudrama about Apple? They tried to give the audience a heavy dose of explaining and recalling the events of Steve Jobs’ life and the rise of Apple as a company, but the material doesn’t mesh together  to form a cohesive and clear biopic. No, everything jumbles together so tight to the point where it feels like you’re watching two films in one.

Also, the tone for how Jobs wanted to portray Steve Jobs the man isn’t clear. You’ll clearly see Steve Jobs is willing to do anything and sacrifice anything to be the best and be the first to achieve innovation. Friendships, family, previous relationships. It doesn’t matter. If Steve Jobs feels like you’re holding him back for whatever reason, he will cut all ties with you without thinking twice about it. Sounds like a ruthless and cold-hearted person, huh? But no matter what, Jobs sticks to a sympathetic tone for Kutcher. Whether he’s obsessive, wrong, or flat out delusional, Steve Jobs has a good heart? So in the end, Jobs feels like a massive contradiction of itself.

Ashton Kutcher having the spitting image look to resemble Steve Jobs helps, and his performance isn’t a big problem here. Still, Jobs is a pretty lousy film. The production values aren’t anything to brag about, and I guarantee you Jobs could pass as a made-for-TV movie. Jobs is a bland, painfully boring, and uninspired biopic, that almost put me to sleep about three or four times, and the sappy moments reach a “too unbearable” point more than once.

Rating: 2/10


Friday, September 6, 2013

Mitch's Memorable & Disappointing Death Scenes!

Of course, I'm talking about death scenes, so be warned, this post will be full of spoilers!

Sentimentality, a tear jerking, or maybe you were just happy to see said character go? My first example of being happy to see a character go would be Dave Kleinfeld from Carlito's Way. He was such a slimy, backstabbing weasel, and you were just waiting for that one moment, when he finally got what he deserved. That moment came, while Kleinfeld was in the hospital recovering from an attack. Carlito reveals his knowledge of Kleinfeld planning to use him as a fall guy to save his own ass from the DA, Norwalk. Of course, Kleinfeld showed no mercy for betraying the one man, who trusted and believed in him, but Carlito got the last laugh, by taking the bullets out of Kleinfeld's gun.

                                                                Carlito's Way


                                  
                                                     

                                                               Fright Night 2

Another one of my picks comes from Fright Night 2. It looked like Regine was moments away from taking Charley with her to become a servant for all eternity, but Peter Vincent saves the day at the last second.

I know most of you might think this moment is predictable. Vampire, sunlight, and the good guys prevailing through adversity. The same thoughts were running through my head, when I watched Fright Night 2 for the first time years ago.

You can see the outcome coming, but it's all done so well. You believe that hopeless and frightened look on William Ragsdale's face, as he reaches up for Regine's hand. Looking at McDowall's petrified body language and facial expressions, you would believe Peter is running away for cover, but he grabs a piece of a broken mirror to reflect the sunlight on to Regine (which is a pretty creative way of using sunlight on vampires).

And with Regine, cocky, confident, and finally believing she has Charley right where she wants him, is shocked to see Charley fight her control, pulling her into the beam of sunlight. One moment Julie Carmen (Regine) is salivating in Vincent's cowardice and her triumph over Charley, and the very next moment, the rug is pulled out underneath her, as she meets her end. Predictable for sure, but everyone did such a great job of selling the moments, it's almost impossible to look away.

                                

Which brings me to the disappointing part of this post. Remember how Bane died in The Dark Knight Rises? Throughout the movie, he's built up as this unstoppable adversary/monster, and then this happens:

                                                          The Dark Knight Rises

                               

In a matter of minutes, Bane's mystique fades away, because Talia is the true primary villain and mastermind, who pulled all the strings, making Bane look like a hired goon. And on top of that, the big moment for his death was so sudden and weak. He tosses Batman around like a ragdoll at first, has a brutal fist fight with him....and out of nowhere he's taken out by a blindside attack? Very underwhelming and disappointing.

Adriana was convinced Christopher was going to go with her into the witness protection program. But Christopher pulled a fast one. The set up was just brilliant. I can remember watching the premiere of this episode with my father, and both us were sucked into believing Tony's call about Christopher trying to commit suicide. Gandolfini sold it so well, but Adriana knew what was coming, when she looked out the window and saw the empty forest. Drea de Matteo's look of heartbreak after realizing the love of her life turned his back on her is something to remember, because Adriana was one of the RARE likeable characters on this show, who you could actually feel sympathy for.

                                                            The Sopranos
 
                           

                                                          Predator2

There's only once scene worth watching in Predator 2: the fiasco at the slaughter house. Keyes (Gary Busey) was so sure he finally set the perfect trap for the Predator, but as usual, the Predator outsmarted his prey, quickly killing all of Keyes' men. And Keyes saves his rival in the movie, Harrigan (Danny Glover), and is beheaded seconds later by the Predator. A true shocking moment, because it appeared Keyes was done for, he comes back, saves Harrigan, and then he turns around to meet his own end.
                        
                                                         Deathproof

Stuntman Mike was supposed to be a sociopath, but this is how it all ends for him?


                           

Take away Vanessa Ferlito's steamy dance and the final chase scene, and DeathProof is a real chore to sit through. It's Tarantino's worst film by far, and I struggle to get through the whole thing in one viewing every time I decide to watch it. And the dialogue? Yikes?  DeathProof is a prime example of Tarantino's greatest strength also being his greatest weakness. That scene where the women are at the diner sitting around the table and talking about random, meaningless bullshit with Kurt Russell quietly sitting in the background drives me nuts and bores me to tears. It's a case of Tarantino getting way, way too carried away and obsessed with character dialogue.


Star Wars: Return Of The Jedi


You would've thought Luke was done for after he unceremoniously turned down The Emperor's offer. But Vader's conscience kicked in, as he watched his son scream and beg for his help. Using similar reasons for my Fright Night 2 pick, The Emperor was basking in the glory of his triumph, while torturing Luke, as he prepared to deliver the final blow, but at the last second, the rug is pulled out from underneath him, when Vader, his number one apprentice, turns on him to save his son's life. Also, you can feel Vader's dilemma, as his head darts back and forth between his smiling master and his son, who might be seconds away from taking his final breath.

But something about this scene always bothered me from the first time I saw ROTJ as a kid. Why in the name of all things holy would Luke carelessly toss his lightsaber to the ground like that? I get the whole point of Luke having faith in his father to do the right thing, but still, it would've made more sense if Luke gave himself a fighting chance.


Halloween Resurrection


Mind-numbingly stupid.

It's the only way to describe this scene. Laurie Strode is the primary protagonist in the Halloween franchise, and they kill her off in the opening minutes of the movie? Imagine a movie where Spider-Man or Batman are killed off in the first ten or fifteen minutes, and afterwards, you have to watch a storyline that revolves around Mary Jane or Alfred. You don't bring out the main course first, go to the dessert, and finish with the appetizer. Laurie's death was a supposed to be a special moment with the right build, but Resurrection takes the ass backwards approach by killing off Laurie in the opening.

And to make matters worse, after Laurie's death, you're forced to sit through a shitty film with gaping plot holes, terrible acting, a hideous final showdown between Myers and Busta Rhymes, and for some reason, the writers felt the need to turn Busta into a karate master wannabe.