Shark Night 3D(2011)(Minor Spoilers Review)

**This review contains MINOR spoilers, no character deaths, plot twists, or major reveals**

Nick (Dustin Milligan) is reluctant to accept an invitation for a vacation weekend, but Malik (Sinqua Walls) convinces Nick to change is mind. Taking a break from a heavy work load as students at Tulane University, Nick, Blake (Chris Zylka), Beth (Katharine McPhee), Gordon (Joel David Moore), Malik, and his girlfriend, Maya (Alyssa Diaz) visit Sara’s (Sara Paxton) vacation home in the Louisiana Gulf.

Along the way, Sara is forced to defuse a tense situation involving two locals named Red (Joshua Leonard) and Dennis (Chris Carmack) during a confrontation between Malik and Maya. Sheriff Sabin (Donal Logue) takes a trip down memory lane with Sara, and everything is quiet and peaceful at first. But a weekend of harmless fun takes a horrifying turn for the worst, when the group discovers sharks in the water……..

Looking for a set of refreshing characters? Well, you should look somewhere else, because you won’t find them in Shark Night. Nick is the shy nerd, who’s trying to pursue the hot and innocent blonde (Sara). Malik is the tough guy jock, Blake is the egotistical pretty boy, Gordon is the geek, who’s suppose to provide comic relief, and Beth is the promiscuous female in the group, who’s covered in tattoos. The characters in Shark Night are horribly generic, but at the same time, Paxton is the only one, who delivers an above average or mediocre performance.

The PG-13 rating caused a lot of complaints for Shark Night, because a lot of people believed (and still believe) a PG-13 environment restricted the gory stuff too much. Well, yeah I guess you could say Shark Night is tamed as far as blood and violence goes, but it’s not a big problem for me.

Although, we live in an age of  bloodthirsty horror fans now a days. The VAST majority of modern R rated horror films are loaded with bloody and disgusting gore, with dismembered body parts and chunks of flesh flying every where. I’m not trying to point any fingers, because I’m a gore fiend (and proud of it), but at the same time, I can still enjoy a horror film without gallons of blood and heads rolling every where. Plus, I can guarantee you most of the people (moviegoers and critics) complaining about the lack of blood and gore in this film are the same people, who would raise hell, if Shark Night was another senseless gore fest, using the “we’ve all seen this before” complaint. Yeah.

Shark Night 3D has enough stupid fun to satisfy the crowd that’s looking for a mindless joy ride. Making a smart horror film isn’t the goal here, because Shark Night takes an unrestrained approach to silliness and sporadic scenes of over the top mayhem. The lack of repulsive gore and blood will bother some horror fans, but Shark Night delivers a few jaw-dropping moments. Whether you hate it or love it, Shark Night 3D is gurranted to pull some “I can’t believe they just did that!” unintentional laughs out of you, and this one earned a spot on my list of guilty pleasures.

Rating: 5/10

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Shark Night 3D(2011)(Spoiler Review)

**This review contains spoilers**


After a three year hiatus, Sara (Sara Paxton) returns to her family’s vacation home in the Louisiana Gulf with six friends for a weekend of fun. Taking a break from the heavy workload at Tulane University, Nick (Dustin Milligan), Beth (Katharine McPhee), Gordon (Joel David Moore), Blake (Chris Zylka), Malik (Sinqua Walls), and his girlfriend, Maya (Alyssa Diaz) join Sara, but at the local convenience store, Malik has a tense confrontation with Sara’s old boyfriend, Dennis (Chris Carmack). Dennis’ best friend, Red (Joshua Leonard)  tries to goad Malik into a fist fight, but Sara is able to defuse the tension.

At the lake house, Sheriff Sabin (Donal Logue) takes a trip down memory lane with Sara, but a peaceful day of fun takes a horrifying turn for the worst during a near fatal shark attack involving Malik. With no cell phone reception, Nick uses his limited knowledge as a pre-med student to stabilize Malik. Nick, Malik, Maya, and Sara take a risky boat ride to the mainland through shark infested waters for one last chance to save Malik before he bleeds to death, but a shark jeopardizes the rescue mission, as Malik’s bloods drips into the water……

Looking for a set of refreshing characters? Well, you should look somewhere else, because you won’t find them in Shark Night. Nick is the shy nerd, who’s trying to pursue the hot and innocent blonde (Sara). Malik is the tough guy jock, Blake is the egotistical pretty boy, Gordon is the geek, who’s suppose to provide comic relief, and Beth is the promiscuous female in the group, who’s covered in tattoos. The characters in Shark Night are horribly generic, but at the same time, Paxton is the only one, who delivers an above average or mediocre performance.

Shark Night 3D‘s story is straightforward for the most part, but you’ll see a few surprises during the final moments of the movie. So Beth and Gordon take a trip to the mainland to get some help for Malik (who’s bleeding to death from a severed arm). Beth is freaking out from the sharks, and Gordon doesn’t want Beth to be alone, so Gordon accompanies Beth on the boat ride with Dennis and Red. Here, it’s revealed Dennis and Red released the different species of sharks into the water to film real life shark attacks for an underground reality show.

Sheriff Sabin and Carl (the cashier/clerk at the convenience store) work with Dennis and Red to capture and trap helpless victims (usually college kids), so they can film their deaths from shark attacks on camera. Dennis, still bitter and seeking revenge for an accident caused by Sara during their teenage years, plans to torture Sara to death by locking her in a cage, and dumping a bucket of blood in the water for a hungry shark. Long story short, Sara ran into Dennis’ face with a jet ski years ago, and she was too ashamed to visit Dennis in the hospital during his recovery.

The Sheriff Sabin twist? Yeah, it’s genuinely shocking, and Sabin breaks the fourth wall by mentioning Shark Week and Faces Of Death as sources of inspiration. The twist with Dennis and Red as bad guys? Eh, not so much. Red is so CREEPY, and Dennis is just too shady throughout the film. The reveals for both characters aren’t shocking at all, because a. both characters are too unlikable and b. the foreshadowing is way too obvious.

The PG-13 rating caused a lot of complaints for Shark Night, because a lot of people believed (and still believe) a PG-13 environment restricted the gory stuff too much. Well, yeah I guess you could say Shark Night is tamed as far as blood and violence goes, but it’s not a big problem for me. The trick of using a lot of  blood to fill the waters after and during shark attacks will annoy most people, but Malik’s mangled arm? Yikes. It’s a pretty nasty sight to look at, so Shark Night has enough decency to throw the gore fiends one bone.

Although, we live in an age of  bloodthirsty horror fans now a days. The VAST majority of modern R rated horror films are loaded with bloody and disgusting gore, with dismembered body parts and chunks of flesh flying every where. I’m not trying to point any fingers, because I’m a gore fiend (and proud of it), but at the same time, I can still enjoy a horror film without gallons of blood and heads rolling every where. Plus, I can guarantee you most of the people (moviegoers and critics) complaining about the lack of blood and gore in this film are the same people, who would raise hell, if Shark Night was another senseless gore fest, using the “we’ve all seen this before” complaint. Yeah.

Shark Night 3D has enough stupid fun to satisfy the crowd that’s looking for a mindless joy ride. Making a smart horror film isn’t the goal here, because Shark Night takes an unrestrained approach to silliness and sporadic scenes of over the top mayhem. The lack of repulsive gore and blood will bother some horror fans, but Shark Night delivers a few jaw-dropping moments. Blake’s death is a good example. He’s riding on the jet ski, and out of nowhere, this great white shark jumps out the water, and the shark devours half of Blake’s body. Whether you hate it or love it, Shark Night 3D is gurranted to pull some “I can’t believe they just did that!” unintentional laughs out of you, and this one earned a spot on my list of guilty pleasures.

Rating: 5/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

And remember Amazon offers free Kindle App downloads for various platforms. Follow this link to find out more- http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

And don't forget to like both of my Facebook pages, because the Mitch MacReady 2 Facebook page includes quotes from both ebooks that can't fit into Tweets-

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Silent Night (2012)

**This review contains spoilers**

It’s Christmas Eve, and a murderous Santa Claus is determined to punish everyone on his naughty list. A small town’s annual Christmas Eve parade is a joyous and peaceful tradition, but two local cops must stop Santa’s bloody rampage. Sheriff James Cooper (Malcolm McDowell) and his nervous Deputy, Aubrey (Jamie King) are the last line of defense. Will they be able to save what’s left of Christmas? Or will Santa eliminate each target on his hit list?

Jamie King. She easily delivers the best performance in this film. On the acting side of things, King really carries this film on her back, because Malcolm McDowell’s performance is just atrocious. And yes, McDowell’s performance is a problem, because he receives a significant amount of screen time. McDowell just phones it in here, and to make things worse, his character is an annoying asshole.

Now let’s talk about Santa. He’s a raging lunatic, and more importantly, Santa has an intimidating presence in the remake. Robert Brian Wilson (the Santa in the original) wasn’t intimidating or scary. In fact, he was kind of goofy at times. But 2012 Santa is a cold-blooded killer, and  the dark eyes on the mask really pull everything together.

Plus, Santa has a larger arsenal of weapons this time around. You can see the flamethrower on the box cover, and Santa also uses a stun gun and a poker. And of course, for the sake of nostalgia, Santa will break out the axe every now and then.

The Silent Night remake is more serious than the original. The 1984 original was very campy and cheesy, but Silent Night 2012 is darker. But the fan base for Silent Night, Deadly Night constantly over hypes that film. Let’s be honest, Silent Night, Deadly Night isn’t remembered for being a quality film. The controversy surrounding the 1984 release caused the uproar. Remember, watching Santa murder people crossed too many lines in 1984, and Silent Night, Deadly Night was pulled from theaters. Angry mothers protested, and the critics went out of their way to condemn it. So in the end, the original is remembered for creating unreal amounts of controversy, because quality wise, it’s an average film at best. Hell, take away the Christmas theme, and it’s just another cheesy and over the top slasher from the 80’s. 

All in all, Silent Night is a respectable remake, but it’s not good enough to stand out amongst other modern-day slasher flicks, that feature tons of blood and nudity. I enjoyed this film, but horror remakes based on campy 80’s originals share this annoying trend. For some strange reason, the filmmakers try so hard to make a more serious movie. If we distance ourselves from the campy stuff in the original, we’ll make a better film. This seems to be the thought process. But if you’re going to fall into the bin with so many other predictable and ordinary modern-day slashers, then what’s the point of changing?

So yeah, if you’re into Christmas horror, and a psychopathic Santa Claus murderer, then Silent Night is worth watching. There’s a nice cliffhanger at the end, and the cliffhanger sets up a sequel. I would give another set of Silent Night films a chance, but nothing is guaranteed so far. But if it does happen, Jamie King NEEDS to come back. Fuck Malcolm McDowell.

Final Rating: 6/10