2013 End Of The Year Awards- Worst Film- Movie 43

"Hey. Here's an idea. Let's put a bunch of noteworthy actors and actresses, including two former Oscar winners (Kate Winslet and Halle Berry), in a sketch comedy anthology film together, so they can humiliate themselves for an hour and thirty-seven minutes. It'll be great!"

Well, there's one big problem with this thought process: the novelty of name actors and actresses humiliating themselves doesn't last long. To paint a clearer picture, the novelty wears off in the first fifteen to twenty minutes of the movie.

I'm not going to stand up on a soapbox for a morality, because if you follow my blog, you'll know I'm a big fan of some nasty and violent horror movies. With that said, Movie 43 features one of the worst cases of overkill I've ever seen.When you constantly go out of your way to shove gross-out gags and profane comedy down the audience's throats, the gags and the jokes quickly lose their intended shock value.

Need some examples? Vanessa (Anna Faris) wants her husband Jason (Chris Pratt) to defecate on her, and Jason loads up on Mexican food to prepare for the big night. Robert (Liev Schreiber) and Samantha (Naomi Watts) constantly humiliate and haze their home schooled son, Kevin (Jeremy Allen White), and one of the pranks involves tying Jeremy to a pole outside, and they use feces to write on his torso. And the short featuring Hugh Jackman's Davis? Oy vey. There's a scrotum attached  to Davis' chin, and for some reason, Kate Winslet (Jackman's date) is the only person, who notices or is bothered by Jackman's abnormal condition.

Movie 43 is unfunny and tedious. That's bad enough, but that's not the most frustrating problem with 2013's biggest turkey. The directors and writers completely wasted different sets of actors and actress with lame humor, dull jokes, and mind-numbing stupidity. Sorry, but it's unacceptable, and I can't look the other way, when you waste an overall cast that's LOADED with talent.

There's a reason why I chose the picture with Richard Gere for this post. Gere's body language and facial expressions during the iBabe short capture my "what am I watching????" feelings for this abomination during my trip to the theater. Honestly, I had high hopes for Movie 43, but Movie 43 earned a spot on my list of bad theater experiences, because it's a chore to sit through, and I couldn't shake the felling of someone cheating me out of $10.00.

Take Me Home Tonight (2011)(Minor Spoilers Review)

**This review contains MINOR spoilers, no big surprises, plot twists, or details are revealed in this review **

In 1980’s Los Angeles, a Young Matt Franklin (Topher Grace) tries to win the heart of  his high school crush, Tori Frederking (Teresa Palmer) with the help of his twin sister, Wendy (Anna Faris), and his best friend, Barry Nathan (Dan Fogler). Working at a Suncoast Video store within the local mall after graduating from MIT, Matt is under pressure from his father, Bill (Micahel Biehn), who also works nights as a police officer, to do something meaningful with his life before it’s too late. Meanwhile, Matt tries to warn Wendy about her boyfriend Kyle Masterson’s (Chris Pratt) controlling habits, and his dreams to confine Wendy to the life of a common housewife.

During Kyle’s annual Labor Day bash, Matt plans to make his move on Tori by devising a plan to convince her of a career at Goldman Sachs as a big time player, and his new and fancy car (which Barry stole), a red Mercedes-Benz convertible. Matt begs the help of an old friend named Carlos (Demetri Martin), who is also a current Goldman Sachs employee, to convince Tori. But Matt runs into a series of problems during the big night, and with a need to conqueror his fears in more ways than one, Matt contemplates taking the risk of riding The Ball.

Looking for a new, exciting, and refreshing romantic comedy/coming of age film? Well, you should look somewhere else, because Take Me Home Tonight isn’t for you. Take Me Home Tonight features the common set of characters you would expect in a coming of age film. Matt is your typical shy and nerdy male teenager, who’s awkward and nervous around women, and he’s trying to break out of his shell, so he can become a man. Tori is the seemingly unattainable perfect ten, who everyone man dreams of being with. Kyle is the meathead/jock, and he’s a bully with a superficial ego. And Barry is the bumbling fool of a sidekick.

Don’t expect any genuine surprises either. Once Matt tells the truth to Tori, you know what’s going to happen. Tori will hate Matt’s guts for a while, but Matt will redeem himself with a big speech (or in this case speeches) at the end, and Tori will forgive him.

Take Me Home Tonight is predictable as predictable can be, but I still love this film. Grace provides one of the best performances I’ve seen from him, as this lost and confused screw-up, who’s trying to find his way in the world. Michael Biehn is a suitable fit for the stern father, Faris and Pratt share some great chemistry as a couple (not surprising, because they’re a couple in real life too), and her performance isn’t something special, but Palmer has the right look for the “dream girl.” Fogler is annoying as shit more often than not, but he has a few funny moments (“he’s got no testes left!”) throughout the movie. Demetri Martin’s screen time is limited, but he’s hilarious, as the paraplegic with an ironic sense of humor. Michael Ian Black’s Pete Bering is good for a few laughs, as Tori’s perverted, geeky, and slimy boss. And I can't forget about Lucy Punch's Shelly. Punch portrays this nutty, delusional, and obsessive stalker, who follows Matt around throughout the night with the hopes of a one night stand. Punch is limited to sporadic appearances, but she provides a nice touch of quirky humor as Shelly during her limited screen time.

Take Me Home Tonight is loaded with a lot of authentic 80’s nostalgia (everything from the intro, to the music, the hairstyles, the cars, the clothes, dances, and the lone Scarface reference), and if (that’s a big IF) you’re willing to overlook the predictability, you can have a lot of fun with this one. Yeah, I know. There’s a good chance a lot of people will roll their eyes at Palmer’s Tori, because some will have a hard time believing in one person being so gullible, and well, stupid, as Matt randomly pulls all of these lies out of left field, while improvising a backstory step by step for his fake career at Goldman Sachs.

Rating: 8/10

Still, Take Me Home Tonight features a rock solid cast, consistent laughs, and despite all the negativity surrounding this film, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t so unbearably bad to the point, where you can‘t stand to watch it. Take Me Home Tonight won’t raise the bar for coming of age films and romantic comedies, but if you’re looking for a real chance to have some fun and laugh, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t a bad choice.

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

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Take Me Home Tonight (2011)(Spoiler Review)

**This review contains spoilers**

In 1980’s Los Angeles, a young Matt Franklin (Topher Grace) is still trying to find himself. Four years after his high school graduation, Matt is still working at a Suncoast Video store within the local mall. Matt, unsure of his future, recently graduated from MIT, but Matt’s father, Bill (Michael Biehn), who also works nights as a police officer, doesn’t like the idea of Matt wasting precious time and his hard earned life savings by working a dead end job. But Matt focuses all of his energy on a new goal, when his high school crush, Tori Frederking (Teresa Palmer) strolls into Suncoast Video one day.

Meanwhile, Matt’s twin sister, Wendy (Anna Faris), is dreading the thought of another rejection letter after applying to the University Of Cambridge. But Matt is more worried about the reaction from Wendy’s controlling and overbearing boyfriend, Kyle Masterson (Chris Pratt), because Matt knows Kyle will do anything to keep Wendy from chasing her dreams, so she can settle for the life of a common housewife.

Before the night of Kyle’s annual Labor Day bash, Matt’s best friend, Barry Nathan (Dan Fogler) is fired from his job as a car salesman, but later that night, Barry decides to steal a red Mercedes-Benz convertible from the lot for revenge. With Wendy’s help, and an old friend from high school named Carlos (Demetri Martin), who is also a current Goldman Sachs employee, Matt devises a plan to convince Tori of a wealthy lifestyle, including his brand new Mercedes-Benz, and Matt’s successful career as a big time player at Goldman Sachs.

Although, Matt runs into some unexpected problems at Kyle’s party, when Barry finds a bag of cocaine in the Mercedes’ glove compartment, and Matt’s conscience gets the best of him after a romantic night with Tori. But Matt seizes the opportunity for one final chance to prove himself, and earn a second chance from Tori after he volunteers to ride The Ball with Kyle behind the driver’s seat.

Looking for a new, exciting, and refreshing romantic comedy/coming of age film? Well, you should look somewhere else, because Take Me Home Tonight isn’t for you. Take Me Home Tonight features the common set of characters you would expect in a coming of age film. Matt is your typical shy and nerdy male teenager, who’s awkward and nervous around women, and he’s trying to break out of his shell, so he can become a man. Tori is the seemingly unattainable perfect ten, who everyone man dreams of being with. Kyle is the meathead/jock, and he’s a bully with a superficial ego. And Barry is the bumbling fool of a sidekick.

Don’t expect any genuine surprises either. Once Matt tells the truth to Tori, you know what’s going to happen. Tori will hate Matt’s guts for a while, but Matt will redeem himself with a big speech (or in this case speeches) at the end, and Tori will forgive him. Tori sparks a fire in Matt, when she dismisses him as a another “scared little boy,” so Matt takes Tori’s insult as a challenge, and he decides to ride The Ball. Long story short, The Ball is a big metallic ball, and the person inside has to ride it out, as The Ball rolls down a steep hill, once the driver releases The Ball by backing up in a pickup truck. Anyway, Matt’s act of bravery wins Tori’s heart, and she gives him a kiss and her phone number to end the movie.

Take Me Home Tonight is predictable as predictable can be, but I still love this film. Grace provides one of the best performances I’ve seen from him, as this lost and confused screw-up, who’s trying to find his way in the world. Michael Biehn is a suitable fit for the stern father, Faris and Pratt share some great chemistry as a couple (not surprising, because they’re a couple in real life too), and her performance isn’t something special, but Palmer has the right look for the “dream girl.” Fogler is annoying as shit more often than not, but he has a few funny moments (“he’s got no testes left!”) throughout the movie. Demetri Martin’s screen time is limited, but he’s hilarious, as the paraplegic with an ironic sense of humor. Michael Ian Black’s Pete Bering is good for a few laughs, as Tori’s perverted, geeky, and slimy boss. And I can't forget about Lucy Punch's Shelly. Punch portrays this nutty, delusional, and obsessive stalker, who follows Matt around throughout the night with the hopes of a one night stand. Punch is limited to sporadic appearances, but she provides a nice touch of quirky humor as Shelly during her limited screen time.  

For me, Take Me Home Tonight has enough likeable characters, who you can root for to overlook the formulaic pattern here. Matt’s speech before he rides The Ball is a good example. Matt takes all that frustration, fear, and rage, and with one speech, he opens up about what most kids are feeling after they graduate high school (i.e. the fear of a new world, and growing up). 

Faris tones down her usual over the top and goofy persona to portray the nagging and rival twin sister role (she’s still funny, though). But Wendy has one of the better feel good moments, when she finally stands up to Kyle by calling off the planned marriage, and dumping Kyle after Wendy realizes Kyle is more concerned with stroking his own ego. Pratt’s Kyle being a major douchebag and crying afterwards helps, but Faris’ deserves most of the credit for her stern and straightforward delivery.

Take Me Home Tonight is loaded with a lot of authentic 80’s nostalgia (everything from the intro, to the music, the hairstyles, the cars, the clothes, dances, and the lone Scarface reference), and if (that’s a big IF) you’re willing to overlook the predictability, you can have a lot of fun with this one. Yeah, I know. There’s a good chance a lot of people will roll their eyes at Palmer’s Tori, because some will have a hard time believing in one person being so gullible, and well, stupid, as Matt randomly pulls all of these lies out of left field, while improvising a backstory step by step for his fake career at Goldman Sachs.

Still, Take Me Home Tonight features a rock solid cast, consistent laughs, and despite all the negativity surrounding this film, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t so unbearably bad to the point, where you can‘t stand to watch it. Take Me Home Tonight won’t raise the bar for coming of age films and romantic comedies, but if you’re looking for a real chance to have some fun and laugh, Take Me Home Tonight isn‘t a bad choice.

Rating: 8/10

Looking for a change from Batman, Spider-Man, and Iron Man? Then get know the world's newest superheroine Freechelle Fantabulous for only $0.99 by following the link- http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFLI6VK

Or take a trip into world of madness that includes comedy, horror, and the supernatural in my book of short stories, also only $0.99-  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00EFMYZ0U

And remember Amazon offers free Kindle App downloads for various platforms. Follow this link to find out more- http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771

Follow me on Twitter here- https://twitter.com/LQuigleyFan1

And don't forget to like both of my Facebook pages, because the Mitch MacReady 2 Facebook page includes quotes from both ebooks that can't fit into Tweets-

https://www.facebook.com/mitch.macready

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Movie 43 (2013)

**This review contains spoilers**


Charlie Wessler (Dennis Quaid) is down on his luck. Charlie tries to pitch a unique idea for a movie to Griffin Schraeder (Greg Kinnear), a film executive. Charlie proposes an idea that would involve various comedy shorts featuring notable Hollywood stars. Charlie’s edginess and vulgarity is too much for Griffin, but Charlie forces Griffin into a meeting to discuss the film at gunpoint. Griffin must convince his boss, Bob (Common) to buy the movie, and he must interrupt a very important meeting with Seth MacFarlane to do so. Charlie needs the money and fame to resurrect his career, and “The Pitch” could give him one more shot at stardom.

Movie 43 is not funny. I might as well get that out of the way now, because I’ll probably go on another long rant. Movie 43 tries WAY too hard. Being outrageous and vulgar is one thing, but when you constantly shove gross-out gags and profane comedy down the audience’s throat, the jokes just lose their shock factor after a while. Movie 43 is a prime example for one of the worst cases of overkill I’ve ever seen in any type of movie. And here come the examples (in no specific order, just picking out the worst ones)!

#1- Beth (Kate Winslet) is looking for the right guy, so she goes on a blind date with Davis (Hugh Jackman), a wealthy and successful businessman. Beth is overwhelmed with joy…..until Davis removes his scarf to reveal a scrotum attached to his chin.

My Thoughts: Eh, the shock factor of seeing Hugh Jackman with a scrotum attached to his chin wore off pretty quickly for me. It wasn’t funny, and the over the top antics didn’t help anything. And for some strange reason Beth is the ONLY person, who notices, and has a problem with Davis’ unusual condition? Okay then. I’ll give Kate Winslet and Jackman credit for effort, but Jackman’s freak show carny character wasn‘t funny. In fact, the bearded lady would’ve been a better choice.

#2- Jason (Chris Pratt) and Vanessa (Anna Faris) have plans to take their relationship to the next level. During a picnic, Jason prepares to propose to Vanessa, but before he can pop the big question, Vanessa reveals her fantasy: she wants Jason to defecate on her. Jason is the loyal husband, so he decides to honor Vanessa’s request by loading up on Mexican food and a liquid laxative. But Jason and Vanessa run into some problems on the big night.

My Thoughts: What…the fuck? Truth be told, I knew the big secret behind this short, because I watched the red band trailers. STILL, this. Was. Not. Funny! The shitty conclusion (no pun intended) involves Jason running out into the street to catch Vanessa after an argument. And as he’s chasing his girlfriend, Jason is hit by a car in the rear, and Jason has an accident on impact. Pratt and Faris are married in real life, so I guess they felt comfortable doing this bizarre short with each other. But I couldn’t get into this. I just couldn’t. There’s a scene, where Jason discusses the strategy for the big night with his friends during a barbecue, while Vanessa decorates a cake with poo colored frosting. Yeah.

3#- Emily (Halle Berry) and Donald (Stephen Merchant) are on a blind date at a Mexican restaurant. Emily and Donald met each other through an online dating service, but Emily is bored during the date, so she decides to spice things up with a risky game of truth or dare.

My Thoughts: Overkill is a reoccurring  problem for Movie 43, and this short is a prime example of the second biggest problem here. The game of truth or dare between Emily and Donald wasn’t bad at first. Emily dares Donald to grab a guy’s butt, and Donald dares Emily to blow out the candles on a blind kid’s birthday cake. But they ran the dare gimmick into the ground. Halle Berry fills up a turkey baster with hot sauce, and she sticks it in her……well, just use your imagination. And somehow they managed to top the awfulness of that dare with dueling plastic surgery dares between Emily and Donald. Halley Berry’s prosthetic, floppy, and large breasts brought a facepalm out of me, and during another dare, Berry dips her breasts in guacamole sauce.

4#- Robert (Liev Schreiber) and Samantha (Naomi Watts) are home schooling their son, Kevin (Jeremy Allen White). But Robert and Samantha’s odd methods raise some serious questions for two visiting neighbors.

My Thoughts: Well, Robert and Samantha are home schooling Kevin, but they decide to bully him at the same time. That’s right. And the methods of bullying include, but are not limited to, tying Kevin to  a flagpole in the front yard, using feces to write obscenities on his chest, locking him outside of the house during a party, and teasing incest. Again, I tried to laugh, but I just couldn’t.

Movie 43 is a giant shit-fest. The novelty of popular celebrities humiliating themselves didn’t last long for me. In fact, this novelty wore off in the first fifteen minutes. I was HOPING for Movie 43 to get better as time passed, but it didn’t. Also, Snooki has a cameo in this film.

The superhero skit was incredibly lame, because it revolved around Batman being a dick, and a lame running joke about Kristen Bell’s private parts. Chloe Grace Moretz and Christopher Mintz-Plasse’s short was an abomination. Moretz’s character experiences her first period, and for some asinine reason everyone panics? And the solution is to use one of those micro fiber mops as a cork to stop Moretz’s “problem.” The Leprechaun short with Johnny Knoxville, Sean William Scott, and Gerard Butler was hideous, and they ran every dick joke imaginable into the ground. The iBabe garbage was beyond stupid. In short, it’s a storyline about life sized iPods with naked women. Kate Bosworth and Richard Gere are executives of the company for the iBabe. Bosworth is trying to shut down production, because teenage males are injuring themselves by playing with the bottom half of the iBabe.

And the commercials within the movie just felt like a big waste of time. The iBabe commercials showed another naked woman, and the black and white commercial with office workers spitting on underprivileged children, who operate copying machines couldn‘t pull the intended shock value laugh out of me. Also, they just had to throw in the predictable and lame post-credits blooper/gag reel featuring the entire cast.

But stick around after the credits, because Movie 43 has one more trick up its sleeve! Elizabeth Banks’ character is in a committed and loving relationship with Josh Duhamel’s character. But there’s one problem…… Anson’s (Duhamel) homosexual cat named Beezel is attracted to his owner, and Beezel hates Amy (Banks) for coming between them. Oh, and the cat is animated (I’m not kidding). Beezel is shown in some pretty graphic sexual situations for an animated cat. Beezel uses a hairbrush to cope with (use your imagination) the thought of losing Anson, and Beezel’s actions left me speechless, but not for good reasons, though. The final scene involves Amy walking into a trap set up by Beezel, leading to a fight between the two, and Amy is beaten to death by a group of children at a birthday party? Seriously? And the children use party favors to murder Amy. 

I honestly can’t imagine someone having any middle ground for Movie 43. You’re going to hate it, or you’re going to love it. It’s that simple. And I hated it, easily the biggest turkey of 2013 so far. Ugh, I can’t believe I wasted time watching this. 

Final Rating: 0/10

The Dictator (2012)

The North African Republic of Wadiya could be the next target of a military invasion, and their refusal to remove nuclear weapons might start a disastrous war. Admiral General Hafez Aladeen (Sacha Baron Cohen) is the stubborn dictator, who refuses to obey the demands from the United Nations Security Council. Eventually, Aladeen arrives in New York City, and he will give a speech at UN headquarters. Aladeen agrees to address the situation, but he has no intentions of changing his mind. But Aladeen’s sudden kidnapping disrupts his initial plans. Aladeen loses his trademark beard, and he must thwart a plot to destroy his image. Aladeen will have to live life as a normal American citizen, and he must earn the trust of an environmentalist/activist named Zoey (Anna Faris) to regain his identity and leadership of Wadiya, or Aladeen will just become another normal guy in the states.

Sacha Baron Cohen’s impressive character transformations are fun to watch. Cohen has the ability to immerse himself in any type of character, and I can always believe him as the person I see on-screen. In Borat, I didn’t see Sacha Baron Cohen, I saw a rude and insensitive reporter from Kazakstani. In Brüno, I didn’t see Cohen, I saw a flamboyant Austrian fashion reporter and a proud gay man. And when it comes to The Dictator, I saw a selfish and immature dictator, who whined like a petulant child, when he didn’t get his way. Baron Cohen takes all of his movie personas VERY seriously, and he rarely breaks character in the real world. Baron Cohen’s incident involving Ryan Seacrest during the red carpet show for the Oscars this year is a prime example of his dedication, and when the situation became serious, Cohen STAYED in character, acting as if he did nothing wrong. He’s like a wrestler from the old school, who refuses to break kayfabe outside of the ring; it’s really something to admire, when you stop and think about it.

The mockumentary style of filmmaking has become a trademark for Baron Cohen’s films, that feature him in a starring role. Well, The Dictator sticks to this particular style of filmmaking at first, but as time progresses, The Dictator begins to develop an actual storyline: Aladeen must uncover the mystery of his disappearance, and with the help of Zoey and his hand picked nuclear weapons specialist from Wadiya, Aladeen will fight to regain his identity. I enjoyed the transition from a documentary style film to an actual comedy with a plot, because it made everything feel different. I love Sacha Baron Cohen, but the “realistic” style of filmmaking featured in his movies can feel tiresome after a while, and the slight change feels refreshing.

The Dictator features a good amount of raunchy and vulgar humor, and you have to expect this from a Baron Cohen film. The Dictator is a hilarious comedy, that features consistent laughs, and the acting is pretty damn good. Baron Cohen delivered another enjoyable performance, and Anna Faris was very solid here. Faris was this cheery hippie, but she could also showcase the passionate activist side of the Zoey character. Ben Kingsley was a fine choice for the Tamir character, but the lack of John C. Reilly did bother me a little bit. You might feel the irony during Baron Cohen’s speech towards the very end, as he explains the differences between a dictatorship and a democracy, but The Dictator deserves a place amongst high quality comedies in 2012 regardless. Oh, and the cameos from Megan Fox and Edward Norton were just great, especially Norton’s surprise appearance.

Final Rating: 7/10